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So much excellent council here...the only thing I can add is my own experience.
I was, in the vernacular, "pissy" as a teenager. The only thing that stunned me out of my pissy malaise were my parents: they didn't buckle, ever. Their standards never changed, mine did.
It was abundantly clear that had I not made changes they were prepared to walk. That was key. My Father and I are extremely close (my Mother died in 1990 and so were we) to this day because I admire his resolve.
My old situation pales in comparison to yours, but the methodology to help remains the same: there is a reason it is called tough love.
IMHO, there is no better expression of love.
I wish you, your family and your son all the perspective it takes. Best.
Paul
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1996 FJ80.
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