I replaced the headlights on my car with strobe lights. Now it looks like I'm the only one moving.
One day, when I came home from work, I accidentally put my car key in the door of my apartment building and turned it and the whole building started up. So I drove it around. A policeman stopped me for going too fast. He said, "Where do you live?" I said, "Right here." Then I drove my building onto the middle of a highway, and ran outside and told all of the cars to get the hell out of my driveway.
I hooked up the accelerator pedal in my car to my brake lights. I hit the gas, people behind me stop, and I'm gone.
You know how it feels when you're leaning back in a chair and you lean too far back and you almost fall over backwards, but then you catch yourself at the last second? I feel like that all the time.
