[legion]

In my mind, if Nancy Pelosi approached me at a bar, my short, round travelling companion would suddenly yell: "Chris, cover your junk! Cover your junk!"

And Nancy would look into my eyes, underneath the skull hat she likes to wear when she's out, and start chanting: "Kali-ma! Kali-ma!" as she reached for my junk. Of course, without her teeth, it would come out sounding like "Kow-ee-ma! Kow-ee-ma!"

But I'd have an ace in the hole. I'd kick her in the nuts.