[legion]

"Bob had told his wife that he was working late that night. He thought it would be a pleasant surprise to come in the back door wearing his Santa outfit with nothing underneath. What he didn't realize was that his wife had grown tired of his late nights at work and had taken a lover. The last thing Bob saw was Chuck Norris's foot coming for his head. Fortunately he died, and didn't have to witness his wife making sweet animal love to Chuck repeatedly in the window overlooking his corpse."