[Don Plumley]

When an employee accepts a new job offer, they have mentally, "left the building." The typical reason for a counter-offer is their skills are so valuable and the employer has not been providing them with compelling reasons to stay. Those compelling reasons are the combination of salary, autonomy, challenge, growth, responsibility, etc. But as others have said, the employee has tipped their hand that they'd rather be somewhere else, so a smart employer is scrambling to shore up the potential hole in the dam.

There are rare cases where the employee is truly happy where they are, but are unable to get sufficient attention without the threat of departure. The counter offer succeeds in changing the employment conditions (wages, responsibility) and both live happily ever after. But these are the exceptions to the rule.

You have accepted an offer from another employer. Where do you really want to work?

In my career I have never given a counter-offer; for a critical employee I have asked for them to stay longer and paid well for the extra time so I could insure business continuity. If an employee wants to leave, it's time for them to go.