[pwd72s]

Entering Heaven







All arrivals in heaven have to go through a bureaucratic examination



to determine whether admission will be granted. One room has a clerk



who inputs computerized records of what each applicant did on his or her last day of life.



The first applicant of the day explains that his last day was not a



good one. "I came home early and found my wife lying naked in bed. She



claimed she had just gotten out of the shower. Well, her hair was dry



and I checked the shower and it was completely dry too. I knew she was



into some hanky-panky and I began to look for her lover. I went onto the



balcony of our 9th floor apartment and found the SOB clinging to the



rail by his finger tips. I was so angry that I began bashing his



fingers with a flower pot. He let go and fell, but his fall was



broken by some awnings and bushes. On seeing he was still alive I



found super human strength to drag our antique cedar chest to the



balcony and throw it over. It hit the man and killed him. At this



point the stress got to me and I suffered a massive heart attack and



died.? The clerk thanked him and sent him on to the next office.



The second applicant said that his last day was his worst. "I was on the



roof of an apartment building working on the AC equipment. I stumbled



over my tools and toppled off the building. I managed to grab onto the



balcony rail of a 9th floor apartment but some idiot came rushing out



on the balcony and bashed my hands with a flower pot. I fell but hit



some awnings and bushes and survived, but as I looked up I saw a huge



chest falling toward me. I tried to crawl out of the way but failed



and was hit and killed by the chest." The clerk couldn't help but chuckle



as he directs the man to the next room.



He is still giggling when his third customer of the day enters. He



apologizes and says "I doubt that your last day was as interesting as



the fellow in here just before you."



"I don't know" replies the man, "picture this, I'm buck naked hiding'



in this cedar chest....."