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I more or less lost my fear of death in my late teens when I happened upon the Stoics - Seneca's letters & Marcus Aurelius in particular - it all just seemed to make sense suddenly. Buddhism helps, as did Socrates arguing that it is binary - we either go somewhere or nowhere, and neither is all that bad - which cemented the deal.
My grandfather went about 5 years ago at nearly 101, in much the way your father did. It still hurt, and philosophy seemed of less use than Vodka for a few days. Then I remembered Twain saying that humor was mankind's most powerful weapon, and found what I needed:
"All say, 'How hard it is that we have to die' - a strange complaint from the mouths of people who have had to live." - Mark Twain
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