Quote:
Originally Posted by oldE
BTDT
Our daughter is adopted. She exhibits signs of Fetal Alcohol Syndrome. The disconnect between actions and responsibility are classic.
My wife is an elementary school teacher and is very familiar with the behaviors. She helped us both through the last 20 years.
Small steps will be crucial to make any progress. Most kids will respond well to rewards, even small ones. Don't expect him to be goal oriented in any major way, but you will probably find he has some very focused interests. You can use those to help him along.
All the best
Les
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first, thanks to all of you. i can deal with this much better than my wife. she wants another girl so bad, and for a year, it was looking like we were going to get her. i dont get as attached as she does because i know they are not ours and they can leave at any time.
its hard on the boy because right now little things set my wife off crying, then he starts in, bit thats how my wife has to eal with it.
we have him in counseling once a week now, so maybe that will help.
he is more upset with his mother than i realized. she has really been bugging us/him. she has been posting on his facebook and he does not want to talk to her right now, in fact, he got on there last night and deleted her comments.
to les.
your second comment (samll rewards and goal oriented) really helped. maybe i have been expecting too much out of him, but i feel that we have such a short time to get him pointed in the right direction. i think this thing with his mom may be a plus in the long run. he is starting to see how she really is and what we are trying to get out of him. (he thinks just like his mom).
he is SOOO focused on video games that sometimes it drives me nuts, that thats all he wants to do.
he is a good kid. we spent some time with him before we let him come live with us, other wise, we would have let him stay in the foster home he was originally in.
the mom did do some perscription drugs while pregnant with the girl. despite that, she was VERY smart. she was well ahead for age. its a shame, we just dont think her new family will help her to prosper(for lack of a better word).
i think i am going to talk with the boy(aaron) tonight about his mother and what she did.
thanks again.