[Head416]

PM. I drag myself out of bed in the morning, and even now that I've been up for three hours (coming up on 10am here), I still feel like I'm not really awake yet.

I was the youngest child, so I remember having to go to bed first and hearing everybody else still up talking, living it up, having a great time. I felt like I was missing out on all the fun.

Now, I typically have no desire to go to bed unless the rest of the world has wound down. Most days that just means my wife. If I'm really tired and try to go to sleep before her I can't sleep. I'll toss and turn until she finally comes to bed, then I can fall asleep.

When we go camping with family or friends I usually stay up until everybody else is asleep and then I feel peaceful and go to bed. I really enjoy the quiet stillness that comes in the early AM when you're one of the few still up. It's not like I'm consciously thinking "I won't go to bed until I'm last because I don't want to miss anything" but I think subconsciously that's what is going on. Also, when we're over at friends' houses I usually hang out until everybody has left, then I feel like the party is over and it's time to go.

My wife makes fun of me. I can't say that I blame her.

What really sucks is that I have to get up usually by 6:30am for work and have pretty much lost my ability to sleep in, even on weekends. When camping, it's not rare for me to be the first one up. The quiet stillness of the morning is quite nice as well. But I don't function, I just kind of sit there.