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Originally Posted by twobone
...Except he is a raging drunk after about 3pm!
He comes up to stay with us each summer and at Xmas.
How do you deal with a father-in-law who is a semi-functional alcoholic.
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You have 3 choices.
1: Ignore it/live through it
2: Do not invite him
3: Change father-in-laws
Quote:
Originally Posted by twobone
His wife can't control him.
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No, she can not. It is impossible to control one. Most of us who have lived with one have, to one extent or another, enabled them.
In the end, I went with option 3, because in destroying herself, my ex-wife was destroying me. You are not married to the Alcoholic. I expect your wife is not happy about this either.
There is a fourth option which might work. Get rid of all alcohol in the house while he is there and go to restaurants that do not serve alcohol. I'm not sure if your wife would go along with this one and possibly insult her father.
Quote:
Originally Posted by twobone
I guess I will try to control it as best I can by seeing if my wife can talk some sense into him and by controlling what my kids see.
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Part A will not work. Part B is essential. The kids are going to see it. You must educate them. My ex-wife's older daughter never drank, due to seeing the problems it had caused.
Quote:
Originally Posted by twobone
No more big dinners out with the kids if he drinks before we get there.
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This is partially option #4
I lived with an alcoholic for 7 years. With the exception of her mother, everyone in the family was an alcoholic. Her sister did AA and was the only sober one in the family.