Quote:
Originally Posted by gacook
Why do you go through that hassle?
First marriage, we had a joint account. And by "joint account" I mean, I worked and put money in, she sat on her ass all day and took money out (she was a go-getter before we got married, quit everything after the cake was cut). Final straw for me was when I was working over in the Middle East as a contractor. I decided to do a 2-year stint. First year would pay off every bit of debt she'd incurred over the years, second year would be great for that "nest egg" and the kids' college accounts. I had everything budgeted out, told her what needed to be spent where, etc. and I lived off under $200/month for myself. Even made sure she had enough "fun money" left over for her and the kids to do whatever each month (about $1000/month of free money). First year almost over, I check my bills and there aren't nearly as many of them gone as there should be...and after doing the math between what's been paid, what's in the bank and what I've made, there's $50k missing. Ask her about it, and her answer is she has no clue what she spent it on (and this is already taking into account the $15k for her tits/nose that I wasn't thrilled about paying for).
So, that was it. I'll never share a bank account with another human being. Current wife works, pays a portion of our bills (I make more, so pay more) and does WTF she wants with whatever she has left over. I do the same.
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Well, the issues in your first marriage had nothing to do with joint accounts or separate accounts. You were going to end up in the same place, regardless of the structure of the bank accounts.
As to your second marriage, I guess I can kind of semi understand what your doing. Although it still seems like a somewhat artificial construct to me.
And, me, personally, if I weren't willing to share a bank account with someone, I sure wouldn't be willing to marry them. Because in most states (community property states) half the money in "your" account is hers anyways.
I guess I'd feel like I either trust the person enough to marry them, and have everything we earn/make be joint property that we can trust each other with, or not.