My Son played in his 6th golf tourny yesterday. After 5 holes he was 4 over. Seemed like everything was in place. Then something happened. He tee'd up and seriously shanked it. He didn't get upset. He took a drop. Did the same again. Then again and again. That hole he got a 9. He walked over to me and asked what he was doing wrong. He was calm. It was a medalist round so I wasn't supposed to coach him. But it did.
''Your practice swing looks perfect but whe you hit your back swing is laborered - no pull. Your core rotation isn't enough and your opening up. Think of your basic elements and take your time."
I didn't help.
For the next 4 holes he did the same. Nothing was working. After 27 hard earned strokes it was obvious things were off. Badly. Very badly.
On the next tee he shanked it again. Looked at where it went. He was motionless. Bottom lip quivering, walked over to my and put his head on my shoulder and wept. It was the most horrible thing I have experienced in a long time. My heart broke. He has tried so hard all summer and every match he has shaved strokes off. He has worked so hard. Harder than I have ever seen a young man work at something. he wants it so darn bad. His game has improved so much this summer but today he had nothing. He was emotionally broken.
"Dad, I don't know what to do to fix this. I feel like walking off. I can't go on." He continued to sob.
The Tourny had Jr PGA officials - mostly college kids with with each group. Ours was a girl for Tx Tech. She witnessed this and got choked up as well as did I. I held him tight. I looked over at her and the other players. The other boys just put there heads down and she motioned to to me that it was OK - take our time.
I didn't say anything for a minute or 2 as I held my son. He had grown into a young man who wore a size 11 shoe and often would borrow my shorts or t-shirts and drive tractors and ATVs and hunt but right then he has a small boy broken. I to began to weep. I couldn't help it.
I took his face in my hands and said 'I don't know. I don't know what has happened or why. I do know what can happen. The next several holes can be just as bad. They very well will be. So that leaves you with this thought 'so what'. Your no longer in the medal round. Your score will be a blemish on your record but 'so what'. You and I know you have a perfect drive, a perfect fairway approach, a perfect chip ad a perfect putt in you. We have witnessed it often. It's not there today. It may come back but it may not. OK - Lets let it go"
He looked at me ad said 'it would be so easy to walk off right now.'
'Yup but I know you won't. I know you shall play this out and yup your gonna shank more, duff more and spill balls into the woods and the drink. But I know you better than anyone else and I know you won't quit.'
He played on. Yes he had many more horrible shots. The last two holes he finally saw the humor in it. On the t-box I said 'just rip it - swing as hard as you can'. He did and the drive was picture perfect. 250 yards and pin straight. His form has perfect. He looked back at me and smiled. His fair way approuch went about 200 as well. The hole was over 5 so he sat on the green in 3. He 3 putted so a bogie was considered an Ace at this point.
Last hole he walked over to me and hugged me and thanked me for not giving up on him. I told him I would never ever give up on him. His drive on the last hole was reasonable, fairway shot got him in chipping distance, chipped into the sand and took 2 out and 2 putted.
It was 100f yesterday and 100% humidity. The players are not allowed caddies or carts. He carrier his bag. We ended at 1:45. It was very uncomfortable all around.
During the implosion I finally got mad at God and said 'enough, punish me not him. He doesn't deserve it. He's worked so hard. Do what you want to me but leave him alone.' I'm not certain it mattered any. The pain I saw on his face will haunt me forever. Here is a kid who decided to give up football to try out for the HS golf team because it wasn't going to be handed to him. All kids make the football team. Only a few make the golf team. He practices everyday. He's committed beyond any kid his age. He is willing to listen and work. He has been to the camps and I even got him a private coach. Things were heading in a great direction till yesterday.
After the match we went home. He went for a swim then a nap. A few hours later he asked if I could take him to the club where he could work the range. I dropped him off at 4:30. I told him to call me when he wanted to get picked up. At 8:00 I called him. He was ready.
He was at the curb of the CC - asked what he worked on. He told me he went back to the basic back swing and rotation excersises and then his putts. For 3 hours. No drives. No irons. Boring stuff. Stuff that needed to be sorted out.
I know I need to let it go. A part of me is still at odds with God which is really stupid. I have always been able to fix things. Business models, devices, even disjointed ideas but yesterday I couldn't fix what went wrong. It broke my heart to see him get dismantled.
But he forged on. So I guess maybe he is learning to fix?
I'm still pissed at God though. I know, its stupid but I'm stupid....