Quote:
Originally Posted by Rikao4
not like Tweeze..
I saw them when that drunk hit them or the IED went off..
that's what we don't like..
a bad painful death..
folks are scared..
not the dying part..
you can see they know...
it's the chance to say or make things right..
so while a hell is breaking loose..
you hold their hand and tell them..
I will tell her..
even if he didn't..
if my last words aren't I love you..
it's because I didn't get the chance..
Rika
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I have seen that too. I didn't say all deaths were nice. I said how your family and how you see death and dying beforehand helps your family deal with it later. I saw a man bleed out. Dark red blood coming out of everywhere. He was only 25. His wife was pregnant. Like I said, you can't choose when you die or how. Am I scared of pain? Am I scared if I get hit by a car? Am I worried that I might die before I am ready? Sure. But of actually dying? No. As I see it, it is a necessary part of life. Part of the cycle.
Sounds like we both have witnessed horrible deaths. But at the same time, it reminds us that life is unpredictable. It sounds so conflicting but I consider myself lucky to witness all the deaths I did before I was 30. Most people don't "see the whole picture" until much later in life. And I am guilty of getting caught up in the daily grind, but when I was a hospice nurse or worked in trauma, you realize that in a split second, life can be turned upside down. But should we necessarily live our lives in constant fear? That would be a shame. Even in times of tragedy, sadness, I truly believe you can always find opposing forces of love. Everybody is on this earth for a reason and no matter how small, everybody touches somebody else. When a young soldier dies, I can not say that I don't think it is fair or that he wasn't scared. But I know I have shed many tears looking at pictures of strangers who have been killed in combat. I have stood in front of monuments, crying over names that lived and died 50 years before me and I have never seen their face. And I know I am not the only one. That brings me comfort. That their life was not forgotten. That me, a stranger, 50 years later, is still touched by their life and death. And yes, there are people that pass away without even a blink from any other human being. But you don't know what life that person has led and who they might have touched before then.
Once, I took care of a hospice patient that lived alone. Hated me coming. She never married. She never had kids. She was kind of a grouchy woman. Not rude. Just wanted her space. A week before she died, she told me that she never wanted to get married. She said,"and honey, it was the days where girls got married. People didn't think highly of me." But she laughed and said she had the time of her life. She pulled out a photo album and showed me a worn yellowed newspaper article. Standing in the picture was a young woman, dressed in a military dress. I forget what branch it was but she was beautiful! Long legs in heels. She stood with her lips curled in a smile and her hair done perfectly in that style you only see in pin-up girl posters nowadays. She turned to me and proudly said,"I was the first woman to be recruited". Don't know if that meant in her town, the branch of military or what, but I didn't interrupt her to ask. She told me her job was to go and recruit men to enlist. She turned and winked at me. "I had a lot fun." And for a split second I could see the woman in that picture. I imagine she was a spitfire when she was younger. When she died, she was alone in her house. But I almost think she wanted it that way. Like I said, she was a spitfire. I don't think she would want anybody to see her frail and weak. She wanted people to remember her like she was in that picture. And I would bet there are a lot of men who still remember her like that.
And oddly enough, a young nurse who visited her for a month before she passed, will too. And now, a whole bunch of people reading her story on an Internet board. You don't know who you will touch but remember you will ALWAYS touch at least one person....