[bivenator]

Sibs initially wanted to put her in a nursing home. My wife was very close to her father and was devastated by his death. We both could not stand the idea of her mother going into a home. We had the ability, time and desire so it is not viewed as a burden. It is sometimes not easy to do what is right.

She still has a fair amount of cognition but is understandably depressed after losing her husband. She is not aggressive or loud and has made a lot of progress since her husband passed with her mood and interactions with others. Wife and I are encouraged by a neurologist visit that indicated no progression of the disease since her last visit six months prior.

My FIL gave power of attorney to his oldest daughter who is lawyer. She has got a bit of a cold heart and was pushing the others to put MOM in the nursing home.

Lawyer sib wants to have the estate pay my wife, use a long term disability insurance policy to bring an in home assistant. This looks like a way for her to minimize her amount to pay.

My idea is to have social security payments and money pitched in by the siblings pay my wife an amount close to 30k. Leaving the long term care insurance for the almost certain eventuality of my MIL needing more skilled care than we can provide. Any money in the estate would supplement the LTC insurance.

Lawyer sib wants to drain the estate so that the MIL is then eligible for Medicaid. I am aghast that 4 sibs with dual income households and one child per would allow their mother to enter the Medicaid program.

Hope this adds some backstory, thanks for the reply Paul.