All you happy-happy-joy-joy people make me sick. Here are my rants from my commute this morning:
I have a loaner car while my Ford is being serviced. Loaner is a Ford Focus with the dreaded Sync system. I can't pair my iPhone with the car because the Sync screen doesn't display the 6-digit PIN I need to enter on my phone. And having a screaming match with Sync's interactive audio system doesn't help!
To the Prius driver on Rt. 287 North in Franklin Lakes: I commend you for your diligence and false sense of "I'm saving the world one hybrid at a time" mentality, and the fact that you have the ability to drive exactly 5 mph below the posted speed limit. But can you kindly do all that smug feel-good hug-a-tree stuff from over there in the SLOW lane? That way, the seven cars that have stacked up behind you (including the guy in the Ford Focus screaming obscenities at the steering wheel) can actually get to work and do productive stuff...
To those who may struggle with grumpiness, may I offer the following:
Quote:
Picture yourself near a stream.
Birds are singing in the crisp, cool mountain air.
Nothing can bother you here.
No one knows this secret place.
You are in total seclusion from that place called the world.
The soothing sound of a gentle waterfall fills the air with a cascade of serenity.
The water is clear.
You can easily make out the face of the jerk whose head you're holding under the water.
There now, feeling better?
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Now, have a nice day, and GET OFF MY LAWN!
