[Evans, Marv]

I spent life until my late 30's wondering about my parents and wishing they were different. One day I told myself it didn't do any good to wonder and wish. I had to realize my parents were only people and had their strong points (few) and weak points (many), and I couldn't expect them to be different than they had always been and were. I minimized my interactions with them and didn't expect anything (especially emotionally) from them. That went a long way to eliminate my anxieties, & was something I should have thought of and internalized long before. This won't help your situation a lot, but it might help clear the way for you to decide on a course of action.