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Just my opinion: start with a revolver. I'd go with a .38 with a 4" barrel. You mentioned your wife will also use it so you don't want a heavy pistol or one with a lot of recoil. But you do want one with a long enough barrel to be accurate.
I personally carry a semi-auto, but it is one that I have used for years and I am absolutely confident it will fire every time and the rounds will go where I aim. If you do decide to buy a semi-auto, fire it enough times (several hundred at least) to be sure it likes the ammo you are putting through it. Some semi's are a bit finicky about the ammo that is fed to them. They may be flawless with range ammo, but jam when using hollow points.
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Kurt V
No more Porsches, but a revolving number of motorcycles.
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