[jhynesrockmtn]

Let me first say I'm not trying to talk anyone into anything. Just offering my experience. I was the guy who wasn't sure I wanted contact with my birth family 25 years ago. I then learned what most women who gave up kids in the 40's, 50's, 60's went through with closed adoptions. Many were forced into it, told lies about who was adopting their kids to make it seem better than reality and told they were never to have any contact and signed statements reflecting that. That's why they don't search out their birth kids. My Bmom was told my adoptive Dad was a college professor, Mom was June Cleaver. Neither of my parents had graduated high school at the time and the Cleaver's they clearly were not.

I love my adoptive parents, no issues there. but it isn't about them and any adoptive parent who tries to make it about them is ignorant at best and a controlling POS at worst.

It's about closing wounds whether they are the adoptees or the birth parents. You don't know what you'll find and it can be a risk. Some won't have contact and others can be people you would choose not to know, but often it can be a very healing experience.

I found a lovely woman who gave me up because my birth father left after they got married, before I was born. I found amazing siblings. I found my birth father's sister who discovered his body when he committed suicide at 21 and helped close a gaping wound for her. I discovered things about myself that never made any sense including why I like cars when my Dad could barely point out a spark plug. I closed a lot of wounds I didn't know I had and gained amazing additions to my family.

Dave, best of luck with whatever you find!