A bit of a long story here but bare with me....
My 19 year old nephew Travis is a good kid. His father, on the other hand, is a total deadbeat dad. He owes over 10 years worth of child support to my SIL for his two kids, has many people and "agencies" looking for him because he "owes" them all big time....you get the picture! The last time he saw his dad was over six years ago and the last time he talked to him was about 5 years ago. As far as we know he is in the Bahamas somewhere but we really aren't sure if he's still alive....who knows!
As a devoted uncle, I've taken Travis under my wing as I strongly believe that boys need to grow up with some form of positive male influence in their lives. As I mentioned, for the most part, he is a good kid and has vowed to never end up like his father BUT I am beginning to see some changes in his behaviour and attitude that make me cringe a little.....is he evolving into his father? His father was very well known for living far beyond his means and so got into some deep schit with certain people. Revenue Canada had been trying to get him out of the Bahamas to face prosecution but no one knows where he is!
Travis also likes the finer things in life...dress shoes, designer clothes, etc. He loves Aston-Martins!.....thinks he'll get one when he's "successful"! He is currently in his first year at Univ. He started off in Business but found that "too hard" so he switched to Economics. Now he's "dropping" some courses there again ''cause they're too hard" and now wants to go into Poli-Sci?!?
On Saturday we celebrated my son's 20th bday and invited family over to join us. Travis came with his GF along with grandma (who he and his mom live with) along with SIL and her BF. Anyway, later in the evening Travis declares "hey guys I'm getting a tattoo on my right arm....cool, hey?" I'm no fan of this whole tattoo fad and he knows that but I also know they ain't cheap either! I asked him how much is that going to cost? About $750.... I said "WHAT!!! You're a student! Where are going to get that kind of money?!?" Travis states ..."well I've got some $ saved up so I wanna treat myself....I DESERVE it."
Me: "Ok, so you've got the next three years tuition saved up as well as the costs of books, etc...correct?" T: "No, I don't." Me: "And you've got a summer job all lined up too?" T: "Not yet." Me: "Travis if you ask me that is a very poor choice to be making with your money. You're not in a position to be spending your money frivolously. Wait until you've graduated and actually have a decent job before doing that! Do you understand what I'm saying here?"
So, this is what really pissed me off......
My wife, her sister, and BF all chimed up and said "It's his money! He can do with it what he wants! He's an adult now! You're just against the whole tattoo thing!" Me: "What!?! You all know I'm no big fan of tattoos BUT I'm also even less of a fan of someone living beyond their means, spending money frivolously just because he wants it...sorry if the truth hurts Travis! If that was me in your position, my dad would have immediately demanded that I start paying him for rent and food. Now Travis, I know that in the end it is your choice BUT I also know that the advice that I'm passing on to you is correct. Save your money for school!"
Fuch! ....No one supported me.....still kinda mad at the wife on this!
Rant over!