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40, 2 young kids and 1 more coming. I never used to worry about dying, but after kids I do all the time.

Im not afraid of pain or nothingness, but I want to teach my son how to drive a car, how to have respect for women, how to fix things. I want to teach my daughter to be strong and confident. I want to see if they lean towards arts or sciences. I want to help them with homework, maybe I can actually learn grammar this time. Etc ad infinum.

I am terrified of missing that stuff. In the words of Shannon Hoon "I know we cant all live hear forever so I want to write my words on the face of today"