As some others have suggested - Leave.
Mgmt at her current firm will ALWAYS remember this even if they meet or exceed the offer to keep her.

I've been counter-offered a ~30% raise to stay someplace before. If you were willing to pay me that much more, you should have been doing it already. You were basically happy to screw me. I wouldn't take a counter because I'd be concerned that they were ready to can me at any second when it suited them, or they'd suddenly expect double the work out of me.

I have seen lots of folks that left a job and then went back latter for a bunch more money.

My last job of working for someone was what got me into aerial photography. I was working for a friend and business owner and liked my job. But I could see the company shrinking. Professional photography was going away as everyone had new digital cameras and they were happy to accept "good enough" photos they took themselves.

My lifetime background in photography made aerial photography an easy transition. I was offered more money with promises of rapid raises and a company with increasing revenues. It was hard to tell a friend and boss I was leaving. I gave him a two week notice, and showed co-workers all my projects, and how I did them. I made it clear I was leaving to a company that was not a competitor, and in fact was a customer for film processing and large prints. I was available to answer questions, and help for complex projects.

That company went out of business 4 years later due to the shrinking film business, and professionals leaving the business.

Sage advice that.

I'd also add that she should consider whether she likes current place. The next job is an unknown and it is entirely possible that she could get there and be unhappy.

I left one Fed Gov agency for another and was beyond unhappy. I got more money but the situation just sucked.

When I got the offer for the new job, I knew the HR person at the gaining agency was on leave for a couple of days so I didn't approach my boss to inform and discuss transition. Later the same day my boss walked into my office and dropped the bomb on me. I apologized but it was extremely uncomfortable that she had found out from the gaining agency without me telling her first. OUch

I think commitments need to be honored. And I also think that employers who take advantage of workers should be punished. She does not like her current work environment and she has accepted an offer. She should leave without a word.

She's not going to ask for a counter. She'll submit resignation today and see what happens.

Come to think of it, when I did this around 2002, I didn't ask for a counter. My boss flat out asked how much it would take to keep me. I was so sure it was out of their range, but just told him what I had been offered and said I'd need that much plus a realistic shot at earning more with performance. It was a base + commission job, so they raised my base, lowered my goals, made them retroactive, even paid me a true-up check and things were pretty peachy thereafter until the company was bought out about four yrs later.

Here's how ya do it.

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Absolutely correct. But, I want to operate with integrity even when no one else does. Why lower yourself just because everyone else does? Take the high road and hold your head up high.

Of course there is "honor". The world is a VERY small place these days where anyone can dig in your network and find someone that knows both you and them. And people will remember you when you screw them over. All it takes is a "hey, looks like you know this person, I am thinking about hiring them?" ... "Yes, all I can say that I wouldn't hire them". And there goes your next opportunity in the industry. Integrity is everything, if you don't have it naturally, at least act like it!

I think what KC is saying is that "corporate America" would screw you over in a hot second if it benefitted the business and wouldn't think twice about it. Since 2020 and the start of the pandemic, I've seen it in the way big businesses deal with me. I understand it. I'll adapt to it. And when they need my services again in the future I'll deal with them according to how they dealt with me.

Absolutely. I worked with a guy that developed a drinking problem. When he drank, he'd often like to fight. He was out of state for work with a couple of other guys. After work at the hotel with the other guys he got drunk and started talking about fighting some guy down the bar in the hotel so our other guys (who were his subordinates) got him outside to defuse the impending fracas with the stranger. Once outside, where he only had the two guys to target, he picked one and hit him. He ended up getting fired for it. I know of at least two jobs that he applied for afterwards where the news caught up with him. In one case, one of the guys that was there was friends with another guy. One night they are hanging out and my buddy says "I've got a story that you've got to hear" and the other guy says "Hey, Do you know 'Bob' that works where you work?" "Yeah, that's the guy the story is about." In another instance, he applies for a job and a guy knows a guy that knows the story.

I think it took that guy nearly a year to find a job and Houston is a BIG place with LOTS of places to work.

I am going to brag. I hold (until the end of May when I retire) a fairly powerful decision-making regulatory position over an industry of at least $6 billion. My decisions affect how that money is distributed. Players in that industry regularly engage in unsavory behavior. Even some of the leaders in my own organization, a state agency, engage in what I call "transactional" decision-making.

Absence of a moral compass makes me crazy. Nobody in my industry can raise questions of my integrity, and they all know this. Indeed, some things are happening right now that I consider unsavory. Injustice. Greed. Unethical deal-making. And I wonder if they notice that in five weeks I will wake up with nothing to do and a head full of secrets and knowledge of facts and documents. I may very well teach some lessons to some people.

My mom was the same way. She was happy and relaxed all the time, except on a rare occasion when she saw unethical behavior. This made her LIVID. I feel lucky that I am blessed with the same perspective. I like the guy in the mirror.

You know, your retirement could be A LOT more comfortable...

:D ;)

I don't know what changed, but yesterday Mrs. Lee had a chat with her boss about other stuff, made no mention that she was going to resign, but told me she won't listen to any counter offer. She's getting her stuff in order and submitting resignation letter today. If they don't let her finish out the two weeks, she'll enjoy some time off before we head to FL for one of my convention trips and then start the new job the Monday after we return.

That's great news, Rick. Life stress falls away when we see, with our mind and our heart, a clear path ahead.

What I did- big bank in trouble called me back for new projects with lots of lies and same old promises- I told 'em GFY. Not after last round, we're done.

rjp

Her boss called literally five seconds after she sent the email and asked what they could do to keep her.

The problem is that "corporate America" isn't something abstract in your day to day work life. There are people at those companies, managers, HR, coworkers etc. that you leave hanging if you do not have integrity.

I have seen success stories with people taking a counter and staying / being happy. Usually that takes a decent team to pull off. If there isn't a lot of love already and the rule generally is that you want to avoid it. It breaks the trust and the manager may just try to control damage, paying whatever it takes, and give themselves time to find a replacement.

I suspect Mrs. Lee would be wary of a counter-offer. Could be an invitation out of a frying pan and into a fire. Plus....I sincerely believe that people and organizations should be made to pay the consequences of their actions. And inactions.