Serious question. How did you survive menopause with your marriage intact?
 

My wife is going through menopause and it’s taking its toll.

My son and I are the target of her mood swings and I can’t take much more, especially given my recent heart troubles..

There are NO resources for men in this situation.

How did you guys get through this?

Alcohol and patience . Good luck

https://cheechandchong.com/cheechchongs-cruise-chews/

Those^ and an air conditioned garage for the great escape.

I'm finding out that even after she isn't right and will never be the same. I'm probably going to bail.

lot of time in the garage.

and she's unable to get truly enraged at the pets. so i use them as shields.

Perhaps I was just lucky, but I have a fairly even temperament. My wife knew what she was going through so she tried to keep an lid on the worst of behaviors. If that didn't work, I knew what was happening and didn't take it personally. We made it.
It was suggested to her by a doctor that she might want to try HRT . She knew that would only postpone the symptoms and soldiered on through.

Best of luck.
Les

I am in the thick of this as well... Good times.

Probably won't help, but remember why it is called menopause.










"Mad Cow Disease " was already taken.




Hug her and tell her you still love her.
Best
Les

I just read the other day that 60% of divorces happen during the menopause years.

If anything that seems like an underestimation.

It can be challenging for both spouses, for sure. If the foundation has cracks, it can be toppling.

It does pass, but it’s a multi year long thing.

I divorced during the 'witching time'. Remarried to someone post menopause ten years later.

You may want to find your own solution.

We still can't agree on a reasonable temperature for the cars HVAC system.

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My Wife would get hot flashes like no tomorrow. I could see her chest getting flush and moving up to her face. She wouldn't get mood swings though.

We both like things calm, cool and collected. 45 years and never an argument. Disagreements yes, but they get worked out immediately (I just do what she suggests!).

Seriously though, they do subside. She would take Black Cohosh and drink Soy Milk. Maybe it was a placebo. Who knows, but we got through it.

Of course being Norwegian and used to cold you would think I could take it, but she's German and I swear you could hang meat in our house the way she sets the thermostat.

I got divorced at 37 so with a bit of luck I wont have this problem. :p

(EDIT: I've got a beautiful GF but she's ten years younger than me and she doesn't live with me!)

Someone - here - wrote no matter what they’ll all go crazy one day.
Wise words.

fify

Patience…
You have to realize that they are at the mercy of hormonal imbalances. When things get heated, take a deep breath, walk away, give some space for the cool down and then TALK about it.

Do not ignore the raging elephant in the room as that does no good either. On top of my wife’s menopause (we called them warming trends) her Hashimotos kicked in. We knew she had a marker and kept an eye on it previously. With that proper diagnosis, we’re well in the way to managing it.

We found a great PA that can prescribe, bonus that she’s a nutritionist. Diet is just as important and we adjusted that as well. I say ‘we’ because I’m taking the journey with her so, doing my part to support her dietary changes. Proper hormone balancing helps immensely but, it’s trial an error. Pills, too much, patch was good but, started out to low a dose.. we seem to have found a sweet spot now.

Her previous gyno was worthless when it came to this phase in my wife’s life (ironic being the doc is female).

In the big scheme it’s an 8 sec. Bull Ride. Just have to hold on and hope you don’t get gored.

I learned to start out everyday with… “I’m sorry dear”
Usually covered me for most of the day. My wife is Irish so it got worse if she had a cocktail.

Excellent post.

How many years does this usually last? I'm asking for a friend.

Have her check around for hormone replacements. They can be used to take the edge off and they still transition.

But every person is different.