Handshakes

[Racerbvd]

Originally Posted by peppy

The art of the handshake was one of the best things my father taught me, and has served me well.

Very true, my father did the same thing and look the person in the eye!!!

Limp shakes, don't trust em.

[dipso]

handshakes? Everymorning, but usually after my breakfast cocktail it stops.

[Jagshund]

I say crush the hand. My grandfather worked in a brickyard when he was 11 (this is around 1916) and for the railroads for 49 years. He could make men cry well into his 90's- it's something I've always strived for . . .

[911boost]

Firm.

Limp just isn't right.

I also look the person in the eyes. You can tell alot by how they respond.

[masraum]

I dislike 2 types of handshakes,

1 limp noodle. I have the same reaction you do. I want to run my hand under boiling water and alcohol to get the cooties off.

2 Over-aggressive. When the person shaking your hand doesn't wait for the v/crotch of your thumb to engage their thumb, and they end up shaking your fingers. I assume they are going for firm and in control, but in my book they come off as compensating.

A handshake should be firm enough, but it's also not a match of strength.

I once met a husband of a chick that I worked with who was supposedly a Houston Cop. First impression was that he was about 5'10" and really thin which seemed unusual. Then, when he was introduced and we shook hands, he had the limpest handshake I'd ever met (including from women) and on top of the limp, he looked down at the ground instead of meeting my eye. After that I seriously doubt that he's a cop. I can't see how you could possibly be a cop if you're afraid to meet the eye of an Average Joe. I don't know, maybe having a gun strapped to your side adds 50 pounds. I still don't believe that he was/is actually a cop.

[cstreit]

Originally Posted by masraum

I dislike 2 types of handshakes,

(snip)

2 Over-aggressive. When the person shaking your hand doesn't wait for the v/crotch of your thumb to engage their thumb, and they end up shaking your fingers. I assume they are going for firm and in control, but in my book they come off as compensating.

THis is the worst. I call them the finger-shakers/ They grab my fingers and squeeze. THe last two people that did that I just looked them in the eye and said "you missed." as deadpan as I could.

[DARISC]

Originally Posted by Racerbvd

.....and look the person in the eye!!!

True dat! A person who doesn't look me in the eye is s person I do not trust; and if I don't trust a person I don't like them!

But that's a very categorical statement to make; rather than jump to that conclusion I try to consider that the person may suffer from shyness and/or insecurity that might be manifested in a weak handshake and an averted gaze.

While that's a possibility, my first inclination is still to be very suspicious of the person until I know them well enough to pass personal judgement on them based on those factors.

Looking another person in the eye; profoundly significant.

[lisa_spyder]

Want a female perspective? Too bad...you're gonna get it anyhow .

Now I am talking about shaking people's hands, nothing else here...so don't take this thread down to the gutter on my behalf please

I reckon you can tell a lot about a person by their handshake. First impressions for me are very rarely wrong.

I was raised to formally greet someone by shaking their hand, looking them in the eye and offering a proper verbal greeting i.e "I am pleased to meet you Mr. or Mrs....".

My Dad taught me too how to shake a person's hand firmly and with confidence - "like you mean it". Doesn't mean I need to portray myself as some kinda butch gal who wants to break the fingers of everyone I meet...(not me, the butch bit - probably been some people I've met whose fingers could have deserved a little damage though ).

I find it strange however that many men I meet have a weaker handshake than me...limp, loose, kinda clammy....UGH! Makes me want to go wash too....

Most women I meet are pleasantly surprised when I extend my hand to shake theirs as part of my greeting. It's just my old fashioned good manners and most of the women I come across are happy to shake my hand in return.

Tom (eldest son) is now 16. He has a firm handshake, does not need to be prompted to greet people correctly, looks them in the eye as he shakes their hand and says his first greetings. Thank goodness something we've taught him has stuck!

It's an art that needs to be taught and learnt. We're getting there with the other kids too, they are both pretty good with their handshakes and greetings when required. At ages 9 & 11 they have a little way to go yet...

Cheers,

Lisa

[DARISC]

Originally Posted by lisa_spyder

Want a female perspective?

But of course! Have you gone to the link I posted?

I don't know you, but from your post, I admire you and your parents for what they taught you and for what you taught your son.

Good post!

[968rz]

The only acceptable weak handshake (for me anyway) is from a surgeon, Most I know shake weak but not fish like (often just fingers); they have a reason to be cautious about their hands and I can understand that.

[kstar]

Try grabbing the other person by the wrist firmly, then shaking their hand to and fro.

A "real" handshake, indeed.

[Geronimo '74]

Needs to be firm, no dead fish but no squeezing of the other guys fingers either.