Funny things wives say....
 

'Did you need another flash light?'

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAA

SmileWavy

"Are those new race tires?, or the same ones that were here last month?" "You don't buy race tires for every race weekend do you"?

'I noticed you have a lot of tools in the garage, um...do you think any are duplicates?'

To be fair I asked her to help me clean up a bit so I was asking for comments to be made but that one had me laughing for real. :)

Shoes in the closet.....any duplicates?

" How many porsches do you really need ? "

Nice and quiet around here......

https://scontent.ftpa1-2.fna.fbcdn.n...6c&oe=56D2533E

'When were you going to tell me you backed the boat into the garage door?'

A girlfriend and I were out driving one day and I said "Wow, THAT is a really nice 911."

She said "Darling, they are all the same, the're just different colors."

Today at the drum store:

" That looks the same as the other cymbals you already have."

Wife: "what's that?!"
Me: "my new motorcycle."

Bought a little plastic cooler for picnics.

Sticker says, lid comes off at 90 degrees. As I am immediately testing this, she comes over and says what are you doing? I said the lid comes off at 90 degrees.

She leans in and touches my lid and says that doesn't feel like it is 90 degrees, it's cold.

My wife comes up with gems almost every day. She said this one a couple weeks ago:

"If I ever catch you looking at a woman who isn't beautiful, I'll murder you".

Every few months she catches me with a certain look in my eye and says, "What motorcycle are you buying and not telling me about?".

Me; "Where do you want to go for dinner?"
Her: "Oh I don't care, you pick.
Me: "OK I say XXXX"
Her; "I don't want to go there......":rolleyes::mad::(

"Another part for your (27 year old) BMW.....can't you just fix everything at once so you don't have to spend any more on it?"

But it's cute when she asks "When are you going to sell that car?" as if it's actually a possibility.

"Close the front door"

"I don't feel like cooking today"

they aren't all that funny

I pick out a local car show what will win ladies choice by looking at who brought the brightest color car. Doesn't fail.

Enough of your smartassness!

What exactly is Gumby?

Is he like a sentient stick of gum? odd to think its ex-wife now...

Ex Wife: "I'm mad at you for buying that boat and not discussing it with me" (April 2015)

I bought the boat in 1989 .......

You listen too much.

Pick and choose when you pay attention and the gems will appear.

:)

I've had that same conversation many, many times.

Me: helping to cary in the groceries and proceed to put things away
Her (in humorous yet sarcastic voice): "That's right, make sure you put the beer away first!" :D

"When are you going to sell those {guitar} amplifiers?"
"Why don't we pick up sushi and eat it at home?"

Her (looking at a 993 in the driveway): You bought a new car today??
Me: Well, it's 2 years old. But I told you this morning that I would probably by a car today if I found the right one. You said, "Do whatever you want."
Her: Well, I didn't think you were SERIOUS.

unrelated....


http://forums.pelicanparts.com/uploa...1446303186.gif

"You're going to drive that thing?"

"You're going to ride that thing?"

"You're going to fix that thing?"

"When are you going to fix that thing?"

A few years ago I was considering purchase of a Cayman S as a DD. For some reason my wife thought I was talking about selling my '88 Carrera to get the Cayman. After I explained she said, "Why would you want 2 Porsches?" I said, "People often say there are no stupid questions, but that was a stupid question!" She wasn't pleased by my comment.

15 years ago..
My wife after a nice but speechless 20 minute session riding shot gun in my 911 at Laguna Seca.
Her first words getting out of the 911...
"I'll never question you again when you want to buy new tires"

+1 This IS my life!

"I have no idea what you are doing there, but I wouldn't do it like that."

Really? Are you still married or is she available? ;)

My wife's first words after getting out of my 911 at Laguna were "BARRRF…ACK...DON'T EVER ASK ME TO DO THAT AGAIN!"

"What are you doing back there?" ;)

A few years ago I was looking at a pre-owned side-by-side ATV....

She: You're not bringing that ATV home tonight are you?
Me: No!
The next evening my newly purchased ATV get's delivered to our house by the seller (I didn't have a trailer at the time so he agreed to deliver it).
She: I thought you weren't going to buy it?!?
Me: What?!? You asked me last night if "I was going to bring it home last night?" Well, I didn't...it got delivered tonight!
She: That's not what I meant!!! :confused::rolleyes::mad:

Me: Going fast around an exit ramp
Her: Slow down! You don't have your race tires on!

"Take someone else on your fun-runs."

"I'm just going to close my eyes while you drive."

"Buy a passenger bar for your motorcycle so we can go on rides."
- Hasn't been on the bike in 2 years with me.

I don't hear it now, Mike. I have honed that selective listing skill over the years to the point that I can give talks on the subject.

Are you holding a lecture at Irvine Valley College? :D

Me: Honey, what's wrong?
Her: Nothing.
Me: Okay, I'm going out with the guys. :cool:

WPO, you are my hero

~10 years ago Wife is getting a little frustrated while working on one of those twisted nail puzzles.
"How does this one work?"
I answered, "That one turns the opposite way."

My tone of voice must have been off a little. Her reply, "Well don't be a smartass?" "All things don't work the same."

Almost a Berra-ism. We use that all of the time with each other now.