Immutable Laws of mechanics
 

This post is meant in good humor. Please add as many as you can think of.

Anyone who has worked on automobiles (or motorcycles, boats, planes, you name it) has noticed certain fundamental laws of mechanics. Here are a few that I have noticed.

1. Any round tool dropped outside of a vehicle will roll to the exact geographical center of the vehicle, or the side furthest away from you.

2. Any tool dropped into the engine compartment will fall into some hole and disappear, never to be seen again.

3. The bolt hardest to reach is the one that's seized.

4. The tool you have in your hand is not the one you need.

5. The last screw, bolt or nut is the one you strip.

6. The replacement cost of any part is in inverse proportion to it's size.

7. The location of break down is always at a geographical point furthest away from your point of origin.

8. The part you really need takes 3 weeks to locate and a month to ship, while the Porsche badge for the hood will arrive via overnight.

9. The 12" extension is too long and the 6" is too short.

10. The local Auto supply house never, never has any of the parts you need, but somehow manages to stock an entire engine gasket set for a Yugo, or an oil filter for a DeLorean.

Again, this is a humorous post so please add as many as you can think of. :)

11. The leak your searching for will only drip when you are not looking.

12. The bolt you forgot is always the most important.

13 The oil leak you sought to repair is actually worse after your repair.

14. When you guess which bolt holds what, you will always be wrong.

15 The problem that you are trying to fix with your friends or your mechanic never occurs when you are trying to show them what is wrong.

16. No matter how hard you try and how many precautions you take, you'll still manage to bang your head on something before the job is done.

17. Every time you put something somewhere, a tool, a bolt, etc. and say to yourself "I'll remember i set this here" you'll end up spending 10 minutes looking for it at the end of the project.

18. Your factory manual is lying to you.

19. Your box of fuses will have every amperage except the one you just blew.

20. You are constantly telling your Wife "No...I am NOT building a spaceship down here".

21. You find the EXACT tool that you need......for the project you finished LAST week.

22. You curse in German.

23. You own a container of speedy-dry.

24. Every time you break a small, inexpensive, but highly important part, you order two replacements...just in case.

25. The local towing company sends you a birthday card every year.

[QUOTE=jerry920;4598502]2. Any tool dropped into the engine compartment will fall into some hole and disappear, never to be seen again.[QUOTE]

In the world of AFV (Armour Fighting Vehicle) we call this phenomenon the "Hull Monster". And that insatiable ***** has eaten more of my toolbox than the Army wants to pay for lol.

26. Important electrical components will fail and cause the car to stop running, but the seat belt dinger will continue to work even after the thing has been totaled.

Been there buddy! Nothing irritates more then the clanging sound of your only socket falling deep into the bowels of an armored vehicle. Spent 20 years in the U.S. Army fixing the beasts that go boom in the night. That magnetic retriever doesn't do s#$@ when everything is steel!

Go Army!

27. as soon as you fix one problem another appears.

28. just remember, its never really fixed...

# 2 applies to any part of the car. I still have a 8mm socket somewhere in the back of the GTV6.

29. The nut you can not find is the only size you do not have in the garage. And the local autopart store closed 2 minutes ago.

30. That "quick" repair you do without gloves always means a band aid at minimum.

29. Remember, fixing something that's not broken will end up with it being broken.

30. If theres any wet paint/sealent/glue, you are going to accidently touch it no matter how hard you try. And end up getting it in your hair or on your face.

31. 1988 Chevy 350.... Is it metric or sae?:rolleyes:

32. Installation is never really the reverse of removal.

33. When under a car, you will learn to fear the dreaded "arm sting".