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Let's Help Wayne Out With Ideas for "101 Projects for Your Cayenne"
I think we should help Wayne get started on this book right now before somebody else does it. This book is potentially a huge money maker since you can obviously sell the Cayenne owner anything and charge a huge amount for it. It will probably get PelicanParts a 12 page article in Forbes.
To get the ball rolling, here a few ideas that should target the audience's level of competency: 1. Adding air to the tires on your own. Time= 1 hour; Difficulty level = 5; Cost: $27 ($5 tip to gas station attendant to instruct use of air hose; $20 dry cleaning for rustic-looking wool gabardine pants; $2 for latex exam gloves to protect manicure) 2. Getting Coffee While Someone Else Changes Your Oil. Time = 1 hour, Difficulty Level = 3; Cost $125 (Visit to doctor's office to ensure you are OK after having learning that you consumed non-designer brand of coffee in the waiting room = $120, Bottle of Pepto Bismol = $5) 3. Modifying Cup Holder to Accomodate Mega Grande Latte. Time:4 hours, Difficulty Level 7; Cost = $700 (Porsche Upgrade Coffee Holder Kit = $300, Custom fitted overalls with embroidered Porsche crest = $200; Neiman-Marcus signature screwdriver set = $100; Massage Therapist to massage aching limp wrist = $100) 4. Installing Floor Mats. Time: 2 hours, Difficulty level 4; Cost = $450 (Porsche Factory Mats $200; Feng-Shui Consultant to assist with color choice and alignment = $250) 5. Installing Radar Detector: Time = 2 hours, Difficulty level =4, Cost = $1120 (Radar Detector = $100, Cell phone call to Stuttgart for help in locating cigarette lighter under camoflaged plug = $20; payment to local police department resulting from test to ensure radar detector is working $300, Net present value of 5 year increase in insurance rates resulting from test = $700) 6. Upgrading GPS Software: Time 6 hours; Difficulty Level 9; Cost = $600 (Worldwide Starbuck's locations Software = $120; Worldwide Peet's Coffee locations Software = $180; Spa Locator Software = $200; Polo Club Registry Software = $100; 7. Installing Lacrosse Stick Holder: Time 4 hours; Difficulty Level 8; Cost = $675 (Porsche Techquipment Lacrosse Stick Holder Kit = $500, Neiman Marcus Signature Screwdriver Set (exclude if already purchased for cup holder project) = $100; Color coordinated calfskin mechanic's gloves = $75) 8. Adding Windshield Washer Fluid: Time 6 hours; Difficulty Level 10; Cost = $2650 (Complete Set of Porsche Service manuals for Cayenne = $800; biohazard 4 level containment suit (just in case of fluid spill) = $1400; Porsche Design titanium framed protective eye glasses = $400, Scented Non-Toxic, Environmentally Sensitive Sierra Club Approved Washer Fluid (aka distilled water) = $50/12 ounces. Please add your ideas -- We can make Wayne a millionaire! Rich |
9) Fitting low compression piston & cylinder set, small valves, mild cam and turbo bypass kit.
Difficulty level 12 Cost $12,000 parts, $20,000 to equip home workshop, $2,000 car hire during upgrade, $200 tow to OPC, $8000 for OPC to repair damage, replace lost parts and finish the job. Benefit: gets rid of that nasty violent acceleration. |
Plus I can recycle one or two beginner projects like washing your car, or "Personal Touches."
-Wayne |
how about:
1) selling the stock Cayenne interior and retrofitting it for racing 2) installing a roll cage and racing seats 3) lifting the suspension 4) lowering the center of gravity 5) off-road driving tips ;) obin |
10. Drivers Education. Includes proper technic for left hand index finger steering at the mall parking lot whilst holding a steaming hot cup of Starbucks.
Good stuff there Rich. Thanks I needed a good chuckle.:) Bobby |
ROTFL
:D Thanks |
Rich911E man now your making me want to work for Porsche on Cayenne's, boy those book hours would make me rich!!! lol..
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Wayne,
Don't forget the most important project of all! Project 101 Lease Turn-In |
I should have spy pics on Friday!
-Wayne |
101 projects
only one in the book. (1. Drive Cayenne back to dealership and trade it for a 996. |
Too funny . . .hope no one minds but I had to post that to PPBB (Pete's Porsche Boxster Board)
Cheers! |
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