[wdfifteen]

I have a cold. I hate having a cold. I feel miserable but I know I’m not going to die, so I must soldier on. I hate that. I wish I could be sick and get sympathy and a handicapped parking pass and good drugs but no - “it’s just a cold” so I have to suck it up and keep going. My head feels like a bag of wet, dripping sawdust and I have a cast iron PowerGlide sitting on my chest. My nose simultaneously feels like a clogged sewer while running like a busted pipe. Friends and my beloved wife all have suggestions to make it better. Thanks, but massive quantities of vitamin C just make me poop like a goose in addition to all my other miseries.
My mom used to put a Vick’s Vapo Rub on my chest and under my nose. I think it made me feel better, but maybe I just liked the attention. Now, I have hair on my chest and under my nose - hell, I have hair IN my nose. Vick’s sounds messy and I’d have to put it on myself. No attention.
Right now I’m getting by on a glass of cheap tequila and some 110 octane chili. So far it has me feeling better. I Don’t know why Mom never thought of this.