[Jeff Higgins]

I was reminiscing with a life long buddy of mine the other day. We've known each other since we were about twelve years old. We were both maybe a little "wild" in our younger days, probably getting into a bit more trouble than most, but all in good fun. We never set out to hurt anyone, weren't "violent" by any stretch, but at times just found ourselves in the wrong place at the wrong time. All involved were certainly "willing participants", and we never started anything, except once...

We had ridden our motorcycles (I was on my '76 Sporty that I still own today, and he was on his '67 Sporty that I had owned for awhile) to a local "biker" bar. It was early-ish when we arrived, so we were the only two in there at first. We ordered a pitcher (we were actually underage, but we could do that in this place) and started shooting pool.

It didn't take long for other bikers to start rolling in. When a rather large group (maybe 15-20) showed up (flying club colors), their chief dickhead nonchalantly grabbed our fresh pitcher as he walked by, then hollered at the barmaid (who calmly watched the whole thing) to bring him some glasses. I went up to the bar and asked for another pitcher and she charged me for it. I told her she had seen what happened, and to put it on dickhead's tab, but she just told me to "work it out with him".

I was pissed. No win situation, though. Until another group arrived, about a dozen of them, flying a rival club's colors. The wheels were starting to turn... My buddy and I were formulating a plan...

I went over and stole a pitcher off of dickhead's table when no one was looking. Poured a glass for my buddy and myself. Dickhead turned around, noticed his pitcher was gone, and came straight for us. Strutting like a frickin' peacock in front of his pals, accusing us of stealing his beer. So I told him "oh no, it wasn't us. I thought you guys were all friends, so when your friend over there (pointing at an unsuspecting member of the other club who happened to have a full pitcher in his hand) picked up your pitcher, I thought it was all cool".

I couldn't believe he actually bought it. They didn't like each other much anyway, their rivalry was pretty well known. I think in retrospect, he was looking for an excuse anyway. Didn't matter though, it worked. Dickhead accused the rival club member of stealing his beer which, of course, he vehemently denied. That's all it took. It was on.

Pool cues getting broken over people's heads, then the sharp ends used to stab them (fortunately, most had leather vests). Bar stools getting broken over people. Pool balls and pitchers flying through the air. We decided it was a good time to leave.

Out front, with the bikes backed up to the curb, we both looked at the same thing at the same time - those darn kick starters. I think we both muttered a little prayer as we flipped them out and put our boots on them. Must have worked - both fired on the first kick and we were outa there. By now, front windows were being broken, with all kinds of things flying through them. A few blocks away, were heard sirens, in another block or so several police cars with lights and sirens going passed us going the other way on their way to the bar. We just kept going and never looked back.

That was 44 years ago. *Sigh* I just don't think I have that in me anymore. We never threw a punch, but there were other times when that became necessary. In the instances where it was, that was all it was. Even shaking hands and buying each other a beer afterwards on some occasions. Never anything as violent, with so many people involved as this one. They were obviously much more serious than we ever were. People actually got hurt hurt, like hospitalized hurt. The place closed for a long time (weeks? months? I can't remember) to repair all of the damage. Even made the local news.

Yet, in spite of all of that, we never felt bad about having started this one, even under false pretenses like that. They were all primed for it anyway. We merely provided the incentive to get started.

So, any good bar fight stories?