[onewhippedpuppy]

Markus, your fate is in your hands, there is no pre-determined destiny waiting for you thanks to your heritage. I can certainly understand you being bothered, especially considering what you have had to go through recently. Have you taken the time to sit down and talk to someone about everything you have went through, and are still going through? It seems as if one of the biggest reasons people take their own lives is they won't reach out for help, they keep everything inside. Eventually, the burden becomes too big to bear. Just remember, you always have us, the online support group.