Adventures in autocorrection

I am a terrible typist. Never learned to touch type, so I'm a two-finger pecker (as opposed to a different kind of pecker). I also type really really fast, so I make a ton of mistakes. Sometimes, autocorrect catches them, but sometimes . . . oh boy.

Today I was writing a note to a magazine writer whose work I admire. I intended to close with "I admire your thoughts, sir!" But autocorrect changed it to "I admire your thighs, sir!" I noticed it just as I was about to hit send.

[Bugsinrugs]

Without auto correct I’m just dumb. With auto correct I’m a pervert.

[rwest]

Yup, I have learned to proof anything that has auto correct before hitting send.

[techman1]

Yep. First iPhone I used. Asked a friend making a trip to Home Depot to pickup some tapcons.

Imagine my horror after send noticing it changed to... tampons.

[look 171]

Oh man, story of my life. I can't type and don't do it daily like most people that has an office job. Learn typing on regular type writer in Jr hi school for one semester. I think that was the best thing or class I ever took. It forced me to learn something. years later, I type about 12 words a minute struggling to get through all the reports in college. Now, my other problem is that I never proof read (been like that since I was a little kid), to combine that with my bring thinking about 3 sentences ahead of what I am typing really screw things up. Unless its a business doc, this is the only other place I need to do any typing. I am a sad case. I thank goodness for auto correct in some ways.

[s_morrison57]

The guy who invented autocorrection just died, may he Rest in Piss

[look 171]

funny. good one

[Tervuren]

One of my computers has auto correct, and I keep forgetting to turn it off.

I would much rather have whatever I miss typed remain as typed than the potential correction that might be in error.

What is even worse is when it does auto-fill - resulting in lots of double typed words.

I really do not like auto-correct because I often want to imply particular phonetics through my choice of incorrect letters.

One of those is could of in place of could have. If I want the reader to sound it out as could of with the implied accent of a softer sound instead the harsher accent of the correctly typed could've; I do so.

Of course, typing could of also seems to trigger a certain response in certain situations; this just amuses me when it happens.

English is a mess. I wonder if there are a disproportionate amount of english speaking comedians, compared to those who do not speak english.

[A930Rocket]

Autocorrect and voice to text. I always check before sending.

[Scott Douglas]

Spell Check
Bye I. M. Wright

I halve a spelling checker; it came with my pea see.

It plainly marks four my revue mistakes I dew knot sea.

I’ve scent this message threw it, and I’m shore your pleased too no

Its letter perfect in its weigh, my checker tolled me sew.

[Wetwork]

I thought the #Me too, thing about all the sexually harassed ladies was a auto-correct. In my head the "#" sign means pound? So I saw "Pound Me Too..." Not joking either, I must be old.-WW

Originally Posted by s_morrison57

the guy who invented autocorrection just died, may he rest in piss

:d:d:d

[KFC911]

Originally Posted by A930Rocket

Autocorrect and voice to text. I always check before sending.

My southern drawl and Ernest T. Bass education are all I use...mistyping and speeling as I type like crap wif one finger on a phone these daze...

Does it show ?

[GH85Carrera]

Originally Posted by Wetwork

I thought the #Me too, thing about all the sexually harassed ladies was a auto-correct. In my head the "#" sign means pound? So I saw "Pound Me Too..." Not joking either, I must be old.-WW

To me the # is just pound, and I still think pound when I see #.

Back before any autocorrect way bay in the early 1980s, I got into Computers with a Commodore 64. I bought a 300 Baud modem to connect to other computers, but the modem had no software. I joined the local computer club to learn how to use it. A two line bit of code typed in carefully, and then a friend could send you the modem control software. It was like magic and no viruses malware back then.

I ended up helping many other guys with that same thing. They type in two line of code, and I could send them them the software, and they can get on a BBS and download to their hearts content.

Anyway to point of the story I met a guy at the meeting that needed that help. We exchange phone numbers and I called him at home. I told him the codes and all modem codes had # and ~ and lots of other weird symbols to work. He got his modem working and we could type messages back and forth which was cool for the era. At one point he was asking what monitor I had and if I had the cassette tape or floppy drive or the mythical hard disc rumored to be available.

Only he mistyped the questions and instead of asking if I had a hard disc, he asked if I had a hard dick. I almost did a spit take with my beer when I saw that. He just disconnected when he saw the typo. At the next computer club meeting he would not look at me from embarrassment.

Originally Posted by GH85Carrera

To me the # is just pound, and I still think pound when I see #.

Did they change it to euros?

Originally Posted by GH85Carrera

Only he mistyped the questions and instead of asking if I had a hard disc, he asked if I had a hard dick. I almost did a spit take with my beer when I saw that. He just disconnected when he saw the typo. At the next computer club meeting he would not look at me from embarrassment.

That is hilarious. We were once sending out guidance to Boeing execs about insider trading, and somehow the draft I sent to my boss discussed stock trading following "pubic disclosure." She caught the mistake, fortunately.

Turns out there were a lot of folks there who had more trouble with pubic disclosure than insider trading.

[widebody911]

It's never "duck"

[RWebb]

bettah than the past but not purfect

now invent autoconfection

[Chocaholic]

You don’t want to send an e-mail to your female HR VP suggesting that we need to have our dicks in a row.

Originally Posted by Chocaholic

You don’t want to send an e-mail to your female HR VP suggesting that we need to have our dicks in a row.

Hmm. . . indeed. Anyone you know done that?

[911 Rod]

My speeling is so bad even auto correct doesn't know what I'm trying to say.