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Jim Richards's Avatar
 
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Robin William's Foreign Policy Plan

I received this one today. I hope you get a laugh out of it.

Leave it to Robin Williams to come up with the perfect plan... what we need now is for our UN Ambassador to stand up and repeat this message.


I see a lot of people yelling for peace but I have not heard of a plan for peace. So, here's one plan:

1) The US will apologize to the world for our "interference" in their
affairs, past & present. We will promise never to "interfere" again.

2) We will withdraw our troops from all over the world, starting with Germany, South Korea and the Philippines. They don't want us there. We would station troops at our borders. No more sneaking through holes in the fence.

3) All illegal aliens have 90 days to get their affairs together and
leave. We'll give them a free trip home. After 90 days the remainder will be gathered up and deported immediately, regardless of who or where they are. France would welcome them.

4) All future visitors will be thoroughly checked and limited to 90 day visits unless given a special permit. No one from a terrorist nation would be allowed in . If you don't like it there, change it yourself, don't hide here. Asylum would not ever be available to anyone. We don't need any more cab drivers.

5) No "students" over age 21. The older ones are the bombers. If they don't attend classes, they get a "D" and it's back home, baby.

6) The US will make a strong effort to become self sufficient energy wise. This will include developing non polluting sources of energy but will require a temporary drilling of oil in the Alaskan wilderness. The caribou will have to cope for a while.

7) Offer Saudi Arabia and other oil producing countries $10 a barrel for their oil. If they don't like it, we go someplace else.

8) If there is a famine or other natural catastrophe in the world, we will not "interfere". They can pray to Allah or whomever, for seeds, rain, cement or whatever they need. Besides, most of what we give them gets "lost" or is taken by their army. The people who need it most get very little, anyway.

9) Ship the UN Headquarters to an island some place. We don't need the spies and fair weather friends here. Besides, it would make a good homeless shelter or lockup for illegal aliens.

9 b) Use the buildings as replacement for the twin towers.

10) All Americans must go to charm and beauty school. That way, no one can call us "Ugly Americans" any longer.

Now, ain't that a winner of a plan?

"The Statue of Liberty is no longer saying 'Give me your poor, your tired, your huddled masses.' She's got a baseball bat and she's yelling, 'You want a piece of me?' - Robin

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Old 05-01-2003, 11:11 AM
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Freshly-minted Urban Legend

http://www.snopes.com/politics/soapbox/williams.asp
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Old 05-01-2003, 11:30 AM
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Good catch, Thom. I say who cares who authored it, it's fun just to visualize this plan in action.
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Old 05-01-2003, 11:54 AM
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"The Statue of Liberty is no longer saying 'Give me your poor, your tired, your huddled masses.' She's got a baseball bat and she's yelling, 'You want a piece of me?'

Thats great! . . .it would PO the french too. Which, BTW, wanted to unload their "tired huddled masses" on the US at the time.

great stuff Jim.
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Old 05-01-2003, 01:07 PM
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Irrespective of it's source, I agree with a lot of the points. Most are unrealistic though - I think the Saudis would tell us to pound sand (pun intended) at $10/Bbl
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Old 05-01-2003, 01:34 PM
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Quote:
Originally posted by widebody911
Irrespective of it's source, I agree with a lot of the points. Most are unrealistic though - I think the Saudis would tell us to pound sand (pun intended) at $10/Bbl
How about if we tell them we'll pay the same for a barrel of oil that they pay for a bushel of wheat? 1970 or so, that was the parity. If they don't like it? They can eat oil, we'll eat corn, and develop cars that can ruin easily on alcohol.

Old 05-04-2003, 05:53 PM
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