[QUOTE=herr_oberst;11386941]I'm pretty sure after reading his posts here that if the OP was hosting a friend, he would turn down offers of money but probably accept the help putting the boat and gear away.

I agree with that. Just stating how different situations can be.
On my trip to Havana...would be best if by boat from SW Fl....I don't care for driving.:)

He ain't yer friend .... but he could be your chum :D!

Lol , good one.

Tim

Sounds like her "friend" is putting the guilt trip on her about the leech not being invited. She (wifey's "friend") is probably a mooch as well. Let her ante up the $300. Maybe your wife needs better friends.

tell your wife to stop volunteering you to do things

I know maybe you shouln’t have to, but have you talked to him about it?

Or have your other friends chip in when he sees or hears it, so he knows the boatrides are not free?

Lot of ways to let him know, subtle ways or less subtle.

"Hey Guys. Day on the water Saturday. Who's in? I'll provide the boat, looking for someone to provide the gas, and someone to provide a fancy lunch. Count me in - who else is keen?"

Cool!
I’ll bring a set of spark plugs and a new bilge pump.

Cool!

I'll borrow the boat trailer and take in for state inspection and pay for registration. Maybe get some new tires and wheel bearings if the owner doesn't mind.

I would invite ANOTHER friend next time; get the other friend to say 'hey when we get back, let us know how we can help with the clean-up'.

You're not the bad guy, and the lawyer gets a last chance.

Honestly, I think the guy is a lazy but wealthy, and not friend material. I might be lazy if I was wealthy too.

Does he own a Porsche? Maybe he will see this thread...

Wait, maybe I, and others, misunderstood your situation. Simple question...did you invite him to go out on your boat as your guest?

This. Problems don't get solved without communication.
There are probably ways to mention the simple information without raising emotions.
(and that has been where I've been lacking all my life)

Friendship involves reflexive reciprocation and trust.
An associate is a friend kept three feet away and always within view.

He knows.
a) he used to own a boat
b) he has been taken 3-4 time "He stops and buys about $10 in bait." The guy is a cheapskate. The $10 in bait is his way of feeling he did his part.

I am sure that the previous trips were invites by the OP. That doesn't release the leech from doing the right thing and offering to chip in. It would be one thing if the guy was broke and the OP was being charitable but it has been said that the leech has money.

This guy has no intention of doing anything to chip in. Again, 'alligator arms'.
I think if the OP talks to him about kicking in, the cheapo will whine to his wife and that will get back to the OP's wife as well. Cut him off and move on.

If you were invited to a nice dinner at someones's house, would you show up with a bottle of wine, etc. or just your appetite?

For once .... it's not about the $$$ imo.

And going offshore fishing for a Benjamin or two is a bargain imo.

Friends are a different matter entirely imo... "what goes around, comes around". He's not one of those...

Just got back, my son and I left the house around 7:30 and were back around 2:00. It was a nice day, caught quite a few fish. Having fish for supper tonight. We went about 40-50 miles out from the house. The boat ran great and the seas were 2’ or less. Cruised out at 40 mph. Son ran the boat on the way back and ran around 35 mph, I was napping.

Sure, showing up with a bottle of wine is often done for a formal dinner party. But not always. It depends.

But you don’t slip the host a $20, pay a utility bill or mow the lawn.

I do think it depends on the situation, the relationship between the people, and even the type of boat and outing.

I think that’s why there’s so any different opinions here.

He was invited, I recently bought the boat and he informed me that he liked to fish. Since I was new to salt water fishing I assumed he could show me the ropes, give me some tips on how to fish here. He was no help, the guy he use to fish with moved, he new the spots and I guess took care of everything.

I guess it really doesn’t matter, I’m not taking him again.

I guess I’m use to guy things we all chip in. If we go somewhere and it’s a long drive gas gets paid for. If I get invited to play golf, I pay my own green fees.

If we get invited to someone’s house, you never show up empty handed. Flowers and wine or favorite booze.

The world is divided into two types of people.

Competitors and collaborators.

I like having collaborators as friends - not competitors.

Same thing in business.