Is there a benefit to bullying?

[Bill Douglas]

One summer holiday there was this old git called Mick Gates. He spent all day bullying me. He said he hated Uni boys and was out to make my life hell. I'm pretty thick skinned so I let him bully me for quite some time, you know, let him be the boss. But after a while I got sick of it so I would do things to wind him up (annoy him). One day he was going berserk at me and I made him boil over. He had a heart attack and died. Then a week later the boss said we need someone with the knowledge to do Mick's work so you've got the job (and more pay) LOL

[Paul T]

Originally Posted by Seahawk

Or, an absence of a parent...one or both.

And, btw, young women are by in large incredible bullies; different in approach, no less a problem.

good points…

[masraum]

Originally Posted by Bill Douglas

One summer holiday there was this old git called Mick Gates. He spent all day bullying me. He said he hated Uni boys and was out to make my life hell. I'm pretty thick skinned so I let him bully me for quite some time, you know, let him be the boss. But after a while I got sick of it so I would do things to wind him up (annoy him). One day he was going berserk at me and I made him boil over. He had a heart attack and died. Then a week later the boss said we need someone with the knowledge to do Mick's work so you've got the job (and more pay) LOL

LOL, that's a farked up story, but made me laugh

Pretty sure I'm going to hell.

[3rd_gear_Ted]

Originally Posted by masraum

I view bullying and leading as 2 separate, nearly opposite things. Leaders lead. Bullies oppress/force. I would think that a bully would make a horrible leader. Aren't these the guys that most folks hate as a manager?

"An imperfect plan implemented immediately and violently will always succeed better than a perfect plan."

George S. Patton

[Bob Kontak]

Originally Posted by Seahawk

Can we have you two get a room so the conversation gets back to the OP's point?

It is a fascinating topic that is not PARF worthy.

You are sofa king much more stable than me.

[RobFrost]

Bullying helps weed out the weak. In the wild, some animals actually eat their weaker siblings.

Also, if nastiness is titrated to the level it can just be withstood, it can slowly titrated upwards to breed strength and resilience. I do this my kids. We're at the point now where every story time they beat the cr@p out of me until i lie crying for mercy on the bad.

Sent from my SM-G988B using Tapatalk

[KFC911]

Originally Posted by masraum

LOL, that's a farked up story, but made me laugh

Pretty sure I'm going to hell.

LOL .... there's already a forum for ya too

[cockerpunk]

Originally Posted by 911 Rod

What about gang mentality? A bunch of bullies, or a bunch of cowards with a bully leader?

bullys arnt cowards in the sense that they lack personal courage. this is some 90s D.A.R.E. myth.

bullys are cowards because it doesn't take courage to reinforce a power structure that you are on top of. you have the system on your side, you already won.

[Bill Douglas]

Originally Posted by masraum

LOL, that's a farked up story, but made me laugh

Pretty sure I'm going to hell.

To make it worse. I was bragging to my friends over drinks that I killed the old bastard, and one of the guy's girlfriend said "Oh please don't talk like that, my grandfather has just died and he was a real sweetie." Yep.

[masraum]

Originally Posted by Bill Douglas

To make it worse. I was bragging to my friends over drinks that I killed the old bastard, and one of the guy's girlfriend said "Oh please don't talk like that, my grandfather has just died and he was a real sweetie." Yep.

ROFLMAO!

[Baz]

Originally Posted by Seahawk

Can we have you two get a room so the conversation gets back to the OP's point?

It is a fascinating topic that is not PARF worthy.

Thank you, Paul. Been out working and got back to catch up and here's these two Karens going at it (no offense guys - but you really are).

Take it to your women's support group......

[Tobra]

Bully is an interesting psych deal

When my grandson was 6-8 years old he took karate lessons. Actually, a little before 6, they liked how quickly he picked up on the yes sir, no sir stuff, as if that was the first time he had heard it. They taught them martial arts stuff, naturally. Also a lot of situational awareness, ways to avoid bad situations or get out of them. That was the best part of it. They would split them into small groups give them ways to defuse or distract when someone is getting bullied, run scenarios, take turns being the victim and the hero.

When he was in third grade, I pick him up after school and ask him about his day. He tells me this 5th grader bully got kicked out of school. Apparently they were picking on one of the the "little 1st graders" so the grandson and a group of his friends tell the older kid to stop, to which he took offense, and they commence to tussling, ending with the grandson getting drug on the ground by one leg. They had a move they practiced for that sort of situation, involving a kick, I ask why he did not do that. "I just wanted to make him leave that kid alone, I did not want to hurt him. I felt sorry for him. He did not have any friends" Bully was gone. I don't know what they did about him, but they did it at a different school. There was one kid in his class who was a lot bigger than the grandson and was a bit of a bully, but that ended when he became friends with the grandson. That was a single mother drunk father situation, kid was big and awkward, took it out on smaller kids until he got into sports, which gave him direction and kept him out of trouble.

Some of the cyber bullying stuff I have heard about is fairly brutal, especially the girls.

Oh yeah, absolutely yes, the bully gets something out of it, and I don't mean the other kid's lunch money.

[rfuerst911sc]

When you are dating/married to your cousin , when your knuckles drag on the ground , when high school was the best 6 years of your life then conflict resolution isn't even in your vocabulary.

There is a segment of society that is mentally polluted. They care about nothing but themselves and act accordingly . You are not going to get rational thoughts out of that polluted cesspool . Have a nice day 😋

[flatbutt]

Originally Posted by Por_sha911

+1 to the first statement.
To the second, I would add "usually, they collapse"

In the demented mind of a bully, fear of them means they get respect. In reality it is the opposite.

Indeed, learning to defend myself stopped the bullying directed at me. He simply turned to a new target. He wasn't stopped until he was thoroughly stomped on by a multi vectored assault.

[Por_sha911]

A lot of great comments but, I want to circle back to the OP's question:

Is there a benefit to bullying?

I have to ask the OP why you would phrase it that way with the word 'benefit'? Just wondering.
Also from all these answers we've seen, may I request you answer the question?

[flatbutt]

"Benefit"? No, not in general. An unintended consequence? Yes, for me anyway.

One may as well say that there are beneficial effects of war.

[masraum]

Originally Posted by Por_sha911

A lot of great comments but, I want to circle back to the OP's question:


I have to ask the OP why you would phrase it that way with the word 'benefit'? Just wondering.
Also from all these answers we've seen, may I request you answer the question?

It's certainly an unusual question, but I think it's a valid question. In the animal world, displays of strength and the resulting power dynamic certainly serve a purpose. In the human world, I'm sure that at times, there was benefit from similar activity.

It's certainly a buzzword these days, and is almost always in my mind, a bad thing. Our current social structure and civilization is far, far less reliant on physical prowess to ensure survival. But, it seems like there could be some sort of benefit under specific conditions. It seems unlikely.

I think the OP is asking because it he thinks that there is a little bit of an intrinsic instinct towards physical and/or mental attack in most people.

If you read the original post, I think it's fairly obvious. There's a person that's almost universally disliked. The OP is not a person that normally desires to perform physical violence on anyone, but the universally disliked person makes him want to perform physical violence. He feels like it's unusual enough that I might be an instinct, and is wondering if there's a reason.

My guess is that in the past, that was designed to keep people in line.

I've not run into that same situation, but I have had folks that I interacted with that are usually/frequently offensive/obnoxious. I try to disengage, but if I can't politely disengage, I'll often become snarky. I believe it's my way of trying to get them to go away. I think it's a similar reaction. I will get more and more snarky until they are either less obnoxious or they go away. I could see how my behavior could by some be considered bullying (something that I'd never thought of or considered or realized until this thread).

[LWJ]

I think we have mostly dissected this topic.

My question was about a social utility from bullying.

Someone said it is about enforcing power over others. I think that is the fundamental piece. And, having a power structure can have utility.

But, as we all know, there is a ton destructive violence surrounding bullying, which is why we work to remove bullying.

Fun discussing this. I was very hesitant as it is a touchy subject and my question was a little weird.

Thank you all!

[Tobra]

Originally Posted by flatbutt

"Benefit"? No, not in general. An unintended consequence? Yes, for me anyway.

One may as well say that there are beneficial effects of war.

There are.

The medical advancements driven by war are astounding

[KFC911]

I got a nickle from Opie every day .... until he whupped my azz . I don't get a nickle any more....