is it possible to live on just the husbands income?

[jvtree]

Everyone has their own idea of what is important to them. I think that it's wonderful if it is possible for a family to make it so the wife can stay at home and take care of the children.

At the same time I feel that women who do not work are going to find themselves in very bad shape if their husbands die or leave because they have not kept up with the market and their skills will not provide them a really good job so that they can support their children without their husband's income. Child support leaves much to be desired.

Then there are the families where both people work. There are reasons for that as well and we can't always live in areas where housing is affordable. Let's face it, the most expensive part of living in housing. You need a roof over your head, electricity, water and then some form of transportation to get around. Those are basics in this time. And some places living cheaply is going to cost you $1,000 a month. Somewhere else you might be able to get away with $500. It all depends on where you live.

[CamB]

Then there are the families where both people work. There are reasons for that as well and we can't always live in areas where housing is affordable.

I'm beginning to wonder which way the causality lies in this relationship. Do both work because it is unaffordable to a single income, or is it unaffordable to a single income because both work...

[Serge914]

It all depend where you put your priorities. We decided that my wife would stay home until my 2 kids get to school. Of course me did cut some luxurious expenses, sold his car and she did open a small kiddygarden at home but our life quality was a lot better than those parents that I see running like chicken with no heads.

[Isabo]

When I first married my income was needed to pay for the luxuries. I know some young couples just starting out today that need two incomes just to make ends meet, they're already living in the low rent district.
Other aspects?
I work parttime for my husband as some of his work for clients is very confidential and they trust me much more than a secretary or clerk on his payroll. So that's work I have to take on even though he has a secretary and a clerk.
It's also nice to have money coming in that is inedependent of one's spouse, so I also do some parttime work for Milu.
When my daughter was small I stayed at home, trust me it's fun at first but one rapidly goes stir crazy on a diet of cartoon repeats, nappies and the conversation of other young mother's and their "infant prodigies".

[cegerer]

There are few couples who truly need 2 incomes. Like someone recently pointed out - there are no poor people in the United States, only people with one TV. I live in a house my parents never dreamed of. TV's, VCR's, DVD players?? I'm not even sure how many I have ........ My wife works because she wants to. The extra money is nice, but it would probably be better for the kids if she was home. What was the point of this whole discussion? I forgot.

[Doug Zielke]

"Is it possible to live on just the husbands income?"

No.
But it is on the wife's.

[expat]

I'm with Doug.

Possible on mine - nope.

On hers - yep

[Moses]

Originally posted by jvtree
...I feel that women who do not work are going to find themselves in very bad shape if their husbands die ...

Not mine. I have 3 kids and a whole bunch of life insurance. When I get to room temperature, thats when the party starts!

[LeeH]

My wife works and I stay home with our daughter (she turns 4 in April). It's the hardest job I've ever had.

As a stay at home dad I've met many others in the same position. I know a lot of guys who are married to doctors, lawyers, etc. What's really impressed me are the guys I've met who have chosen to stay home over giving in to our culture of consumption. They have learned to get by with less and their kids are the beneficiaries.

[pwd72s]

Yes, it's possible. Oh wait a minute, Bill Gates is married now...

[island911]

Ah, that IS a tough question. If Only there was someone around to help me figure that out.
Hmmm. . just how could that freedom, of a single income, be had for simple folk like us?

I would surely take out a second mortgage, if I thought someone could help me make that happen. But alas, living on just the husbands income is an impossibility. .. a relic of a time past.

It's depressing really. . .all this equity, but no money at the end of the month. Though I did just get another credit card with those little checks. . .Maybe i'll go buy an early fixer-upper-911. . .that will cheer me up, and take my mind off of this misery.

[dd74]

In Hollywood it's a good idea if both the husband and wife works, unless one or the other is a big time person in the industry. Work out here is capricious at best. Productions halt at a hat's drop. A whole division can close relatively quickly.

Look at Disney Animation in Orlando. The whole place closed down last week. 4,500 jobs were lost. If you were a traditional animator, you had it - no work. Better get re-trained quickly on an Apple and move to Burbank, CA. Now, if the husband or wife of a person in a predicament such as Disney Animation/Orlando had a job, the urgency to make hard decisions wouldn't be so overwhelming.

It seems two incomes these days should be more of a safety issue toward guarding one's lifestyle, and not a way to gain more for one's lifestyle.

[MFAFF]

Quality of life, personal and as a family all come into it.

We 'could' mamage on just one of our salaries, if we moved to a cheaper area and dealt with the longer commute to work.

But, as it is we live only 5mins walk from her office, the original reason to live there, with another 5 mins to a great nursery.

She only works 4 days a week and I get to see the kid in the mornings and evenings....

Difficult to deciede what would be better, a stay at home parent and one he rarely sees during the week. Or a working mother and parents he sees every day and a full day with a group of his peers....

The jury is still out for him, but for us it works really well.

[Moneyguy1]

Is this a poll for "Win-Win Solutions? Just curious.....

Seems as if this is an individual solution, consisting of what is important to the couple. If amassing physical assets is the most important thing in life, then two incomes is the way to go. In many of the especially young folks I have counselled (as well as some of the aging "boomers"), this seems to be the situation. Instant gratification founded on life experiences to date. Those who have invested part of themselves into the equation, such as having to pay part of their college tuition seem to have a better handle on what they are looking for. A wise man once told me "You are born bald, toothless and naked, and you leave the same way". Anything in between is pure gravy. Can a family live on one income? Depends on the size of the income, the "wants" vs the "needs" of the family including long term goals, and the emphasis put on traditional (or what used to be traditional) "family values". With children, continual gifts cannot make up for the lack of parental involvement, although it may make the materialistic parent feel better. Social involvement, particularly during formative years, is the single most important aspect of personality formation. Of course, we are assuming parents that are rational, sane, and emotionally stable make the greatest permanent impact on their children. A well adjusted part-time parent is far better than a full time parent with baggage.

Not a simple problem.

[Sarah]

jvtree - Are you looking for feedback for a situation you are in or is this just a question you are tossing out there??

I too think it depends on a couples situation and what works out best for them. We don't have kids (well...our dogs are our kids...but that's another topic) so we both work full-time. If we had kids...I would want to stay home and raise them until they were in school then I would work again.

We have both been up and down in income over the years and had a few job changes...so luckily...Tim or I have been able to pick-up the slack when those changes have happened.

[island911]

You all are far too nice, to be giving this question the benifit of the doubt.

Founder of "Win Win Solutions"
[Solutions for Home owners & sellers in financial distress]

. .. kinda strikes me, that this "single income question" is nothing more than a pretext to a sales pitch.

[Moneyguy1]

My thought exactly........

[Moses]

Originally posted by island911
. .. kinda strikes me, that this "single income question" is nothing more than a pretext to a sales pitch.

Do I smell...AMWAY?

[Sponge]

Can you?? Yes - my wife stopped work when we had our first child... of course it also meant I went from a new Boxster to a '81 911SC... (Though in the end I found working on the car and driving it has given me much more enjoyment -- should have had a 911 in the first place... lesson learned).

[brawlins]

My father always said that it's a matter of lifestyle. When Mom & Dad raised us, we had a 1200 square foot house and one car (three kids). We were happy. No day care - Mom was home. In their mid-forties, Mom & Dad finally bought a 2500 square foot house and a Lincoln Continental to go with the Plynouth Suburban Station Wagon.

Now, we want it ALL as soon as we graduate from college. We say it's for the kids, but it's really for us.

I'm glad I did not fall into that trap. My wife and I had our kids young (out of college) and lived lean because she wanted to be with the kids when they were little. I worked my way up the ladder.
We bought our "big" house in 1996. Last year, when our youngest hit middle school, she went to work as a teacher (she has a degree in education).

No regrets.