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Custom User Title
Join Date: Oct 2002
Location: Miami
Posts: 4,294
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some sweet mods I came up with
So tonight I was considering what to do with my life. As I sat thinking, I ended up doing what I usually do in that situation- I started downloading pointless movies to watch.
So I was watching MacGyver, and I was struck by how SLOW he was. And I got to thinking, hey! MacGyver is more than 10 years old, and while the Phoenix Foundation may have known what they were doing then, there are sure to be mods that even I could come up with to make MacGyver fast enough to be effective against today's super criminals and terrorists.  I gave him a cold air intake kit, and a high flow exhaust tip that turns one hole into two for maximum air flow, and to make the ladies melt with desire yo. And then, for safety I included some Xenon hyper-bright nipple indicators so that the Phoenix Foundation chopper can find him even duct taped face down in the mud. Those lights are like ohhhhhhhh... SNAP!!! To keep on topic, I heard Richard Dean Anderson drives a 944! And he runs a 50 shot of Nawwwws. Don't even try foolin with it, you'll get owned son! Yo yo- I gotta call my manager and see how many millions I made today suckas! |
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02-18-2004, 10:47 PM
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Registered
Join Date: Mar 2003
Location: West Haven, Connecticut
Posts: 812
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Thats just wrong.
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-2002.5 GTI VR6 24V 6SPD -Kalahari Beige 89 Porsche 944S2 -87 VW GTI 1.8 16v -2007 Ford PIMP(free)star ...company car.... -1999.5 Jetta VR6 |
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02-18-2004, 11:24 PM
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Dog-faced pony soldier
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Hey send that to Zlatco since he's such a big fan of these ricer mods. . .
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A car, a 911, a motorbike and a few surfboards Black Cars Matter |
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02-19-2004, 12:19 AM
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Z said no porn. naughty naughty
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*Disclaimer: The person above is actually dumber than he appears. my web site Torque values maintainance and repairs lots of my rebuild pics weights and measurements '84 944 auto/ps/ac/cc '86 951 Providing ignorance one post at a time. |
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02-19-2004, 02:59 AM
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Moderator
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I'm not gonna touch this cause I think it's funny but if Z or another moderator disagrees, well then it'll be history...
Ahmet
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Cheers! |
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02-19-2004, 04:54 AM
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Moderator
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Isn't there something you can do with his mullet?!?
 It's funny. And it's off topic. Therefore..... Ya know where this is going.... -Z-man.
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2010 Cayman S - 12-2020 - 2014 MINI Cooper S Coupe - 05-17 - 05-21 1989 944S2 - 06-01 - 01-14 Carpe Viam. <>< |
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02-19-2004, 05:37 AM
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Custom User Title
Join Date: Oct 2002
Location: Miami
Posts: 4,294
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You guys are sickos! Get your minds out of the gutter.....
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02-19-2004, 08:09 AM
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vott does ziss do?
Join Date: May 2003
Location: Seattle
Posts: 6,676
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lol. and to think that a few minutes ago I was so pissed I couldn't see straight. thanks for the comic relief, rammy
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02-19-2004, 08:33 AM
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Registered
Join Date: Sep 2003
Location: Ann Arbor, MI
Posts: 778
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You forgot to include the cool collar ...
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Project935 Tube Chassis Turbo RSR/934/935 racer - SOLD in 6/'06 Gruppe B #101 What's next? |
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02-19-2004, 08:37 AM
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Super Moderator
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Seek help now!
(..and check your meds, I think you mistook the pez dispenser for your valium!)
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02-19-2004, 08:55 AM
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Super Jenius
Join Date: May 2002
Location: Syracuse, NY
Posts: 3,491
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I think the mullet is there for downforce.
JP
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2003 SuperCharged Frontier ../.. 1979 930 ../.. 1989 BMW 325iX ../.. 1988 BMW M5 ../.. 1973 BMW 2002 ../..1969 Alfa Boattail Spyder ../.. 1961 Morris Mini Cooper ../..2002 Aprilia RSV Mille ../.. 1985 Moto Guzzi LMIII cafe ../.. 2005 Kawasaki Brute Force 750 |
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02-19-2004, 08:55 AM
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Custom User Title
Join Date: Oct 2002
Location: Miami
Posts: 4,294
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Thats precisely why I didn't need to install a phat carbon fiber wing. The mullet provides enough downforce to allow MacGyver to run upside down above 50 mph. And yes, with the new mods he can run up to 80mph. I can provide pink-slips if all of you purist whores don't believe me, yo.
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02-19-2004, 12:54 PM
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Registered
Join Date: Aug 2003
Location: Austin, Texas
Posts: 717
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yo, yo, where be the hoes?
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'82 928S  '85.0 944 Not Awesome - Being Parted Out 
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02-19-2004, 10:38 PM
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vott does ziss do?
Join Date: May 2003
Location: Seattle
Posts: 6,676
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you forgot the feminine napkin
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02-19-2004, 10:54 PM
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Registered
Join Date: Mar 2003
Location: West Haven, Connecticut
Posts: 812
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Wheres the chicken wire?
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-2002.5 GTI VR6 24V 6SPD -Kalahari Beige 89 Porsche 944S2 -87 VW GTI 1.8 16v -2007 Ford PIMP(free)star ...company car.... -1999.5 Jetta VR6 |
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02-20-2004, 04:40 AM
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Custom User Title
Join Date: Oct 2002
Location: Miami
Posts: 4,294
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ok ok ok.... right now I've upgraded MacGyver to stage I specs. There is a stage II kit in the works too. Yall biznitches can just groove on stage I till it happens. Nobody can beat him as it is. I live my life 1/4 mile at a time.
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02-20-2004, 07:57 AM
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vott does ziss do?
Join Date: May 2003
Location: Seattle
Posts: 6,676
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Quote:
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02-20-2004, 08:55 AM
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Registered
Join Date: Sep 2003
Location: Ann Arbor, MI
Posts: 778
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Is the e-ram in stage II or stage III ... thats where the real performance boost lies.
Will the mods never end!?
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Project935 Tube Chassis Turbo RSR/934/935 racer - SOLD in 6/'06 Gruppe B #101 What's next? |
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02-20-2004, 08:59 AM
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vott does ziss do?
Join Date: May 2003
Location: Seattle
Posts: 6,676
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naaah. I'm thinkin' HEMI!!!
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02-20-2004, 09:12 AM
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Moderator
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Quote:
-Z.
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2010 Cayman S - 12-2020 - 2014 MINI Cooper S Coupe - 05-17 - 05-21 1989 944S2 - 06-01 - 01-14 Carpe Viam. <>< |
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02-20-2004, 09:31 AM
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'84 Porsche 944 2.5L
1984 Porsche 944 2.5 liter, 8 valve 
1989 Porsche 944S2 3.0l 16v 4cyl
BB
1970 Porsche 911 S 
