Got a Date!
 

Hey, I've got a date tonight that I'm excited about and I had so much fun hearing your advice a couple of weeks ago in another thread that I thought I would give you a chance to advise me.

I don't have a picture of her, and I did not meet her on the Internet. She's between the age of 13 and 86, and her hair is a normal color for humans. Hope the description helps.

I think we might go see the movie "A Very Long Engagement." Other choices include Aviator, Million Dollar Baby and The Sea Inside. I'm also toying with the notion of taking her to a Kart track and kicking her ass.

Mark, I did not "unload the gun." What do I do?

Our top-secret spycameras snapped this photo:

http://forums.pelicanparts.com/uploa...1110554767.jpg

Super...take her to a comedy...never a drama or a a love story. Even if dinner is a bomb, once you get her laughing...she'll loosen up. Of course one of your goals should be to get her to laugh during dinner...A comedy has never failed me..;)...to unload the gun again.


...wait..I thought you were married?

I'm no longer married, Souk. I've been freed from bondage.

Blue, I cannot see the face clearly so I'm unable to verify if that's actually but probably not. My date wears frumpier clothes than that.

million dollar baby might make you get a little misty, so if shes the type that might appreciate that sensitivity i'd say would be a good choice. if shes a mountain woman (i have heard about the bearded PNW gals) then maybe something a little more "hairy". like an oil change on the 911??

the karting thing might be a bit much for the 1st type i explain above, but your bearded girl just might whoop up on yee in a kart. plus, karting can really do a number on your ribs, especially in a rental where the seats run a little large to accomidate any frame, and i assume this lady of yours is going to be a tiny little thing.... if she gets brused ribs you may not be able to touch her until date 5.....

unload the gun in case you get to 3rd base, close your eyes when/if you get a kiss goodnight (chicks don't dig looking into your eyes until they "love" you) because your beaty eyes trying to focus gives em the willys, shower, but not too much aqua velva. if shes type one from above, pull a shave, type 2 leave a days stubble, and if you should be so fortunate to bed her the 1st night, think of me and this post to "maintain", either that baseball, or maybe taxes this time of year.

premarital sex is against the rules for Christians isn't it? no need to unload the gun till the honeymoon right?

...but clean it frequently...

Oh, and as far as loosening her up, she'll have two choices. Alcohol, or else I'll just pull her to the floor and apply some wrestling holds of a stretching nature. Or perhaps sodium pentathol. Actually, we've chatted a couple of times and seem to get along very well so I'm not nervous, just excited. And I'm not really thinking about "getting lucky" except to be a little scared of that. But I'll think about the comedy movie thing.

Sadly, she has no beard but she is a bit on the slender side. I suppose Karting would beat her up a bit.

I leave the eye-closing up to the female.

i heard million dollar baby was long and boring.

I've been married 22 years come this December. I read a lot though and what I've gathered is, getting lucky on the first date almost never ever happens nowadays. You single fellas lemme know if I'm wrong. So you may not have to unload but it's better to be prepared.

First, don't mention that you Internet-solicited (let alone took) the dating advice of a bunch of Porschegeeks, the vast majority of whom you've never met. She won't think that's cute just yet.

If you're not the kind of guy who wants to see chyck flicks, don't go to one tonight (this is part of the being up-front thing I mentioned in another thread). You don't want to engender false (or too-high) expectations.

Eat non-spicy food, 2 drink maximum (even if it's just beer), bring mints (not gum) and chewable pepto (trust me). Have a reasonably cool "loungy" place ready to suggest for post-movie hanging out. This avoids the "what do you wanna do? I dunno, what do you wanna do?" crap that I hate.

The balance of concerns for the venue is delicate here -- you want a place where you can speak in normal tones and be heard, but not so quiet/dead that there's nothing to pay attention to/discuss.

And, just in case, make sure your home is tidy before you go out... as an added plus, this will give you something to do w/ your nervous energy before the date. The place need not be immaculate (unless it always is) as this is part of the managing expectations from the get-go theory. If it's too clean, you risk her thinking you were pretty sure she'd be seeing the place that night... I assume you have a bottle of wine and some good coffee lying around the house.

If all else fails, scopalomine.

JP

Dont talk politics! She will either want to throttle you -or- (more likely) its the same old hooey every guy has been blathering to her...

Almost forgot: call ahead to make sure the restaurant/lounge you choose will allow her seeing-eye dog. :D

JP

JP :D


Supe- Tell her that you're not really Clark Kent. :cool:

Okay seriously . . .don't go there. Let her tell you all of her strange history .. . like was she born with extra toes . .. or a tail.

Bag the movie, go Karting. Much more opportunity for dialog there. Movies are just spoon-feeding of some one else story. -barely a shared experience. . . should be saved for a night of mind-numbing
http://www.pelicanparts.com/support/smileys/sleep.gif

Anyway, If karting beats her up a bit, then you know she had fun. Also, it will give you a chance to "help her" improve her driving skills . .. if she is at all into it. If she ignores your (911 auto-x)advice . .. well, that will be telling.

Oh, and try NOT to start telling her how the track infrastructure ought to be improved with light-rail and higher gas-tax. :p

JP, I kinda want to see A Very Long Engagement. It's a foreign film and I tend to like those better, and it's got great cinematography I guess. The Sea Inside looks like it might be too serious/sad/powerful. Million Dollar Baby looks like a waste of time. Aviator, maybe.

Island, I already have learned the trick of talking about "you." The sweetest sound people hear is their own name, and their favorite subject is always.......well, you know.

I just hope Lex Luthor does not make another attempt at the destruction of the world tonight. I have not told her about my super powers and phone booths are getting hard to find these days.

If we don't go karting, then I'll just impress her with some drift maneuvers on the freeway and a little heel/toe cornering. I'm sure she'll be putty in my hands after that. Or vomit.

Hell, I've been married so long now, I feel like I was born married. Supe, good luck...I hope it's an enjoyable date.

and their favorite subject is always.......well, you know.

... it's me, isn't it? I knew it. Everybody Loves The JP.

J/k.

Or am I?

Discuss...


Re: the movie, if you're into feeelm, that's great, just make sure that A Very Long Engagement is not a Very Long Movie. The danger w/ a movie for a first date is if one party is not into it, they'll probably fade out earlier... and if they're really not into the movie, there's a good chance they'll think "he likes this crap?!?" -- remember, even though you've got nothing to do with the content of a movie, to some degree you'll be held vicariously liable for it b/c you suggested it. Just a thought.

That's why I always start with Fight Club. :D

JP

Y'know I've heard that strip bars are good places to take a date. And the funny thing is that several people chimed in to agree, and the faces were serious as stone. They said the dancers focus on the ladies in the room, and they all have fun together. Or something like that. No, there's no way I'm going to take a lady there. I've not been inside one myself.

Thanks, Paul. As I say, we've had some good chats already, so even if we just find somewhere to sit and visit, it'll probably be fun.

Do you guys really think that unloading the gun is advisable? I mean, I've become fairly masterful at the screw-marathon thing over the years (baseball, taxes, etc.), and I think I've learned lately that this is not ideal. The best rhythm for that dance seems to be one that builds, and then ends.

The karting thing is a lot of fun. I've actually taken a couple of dates there, one was a first date, one wasn't, both times were a complete blast. They were both really small too, I don't think it was that big of a deal.

I had it planned for having lunch after, makes it more of a casual thing, easier to dress for something that will fit both. We hit Bahama Breeze the last time, close to Sykart and good food. If you want to take her out to a fancy dinner she might look a little silly driving a kart in a skirt and heels, so keep that in mind.

Or another option is to just wait until tomorrow and bring her to breakfast at XXX. We'll all be nice.... right guys? ;)

I may actually bring along a friend tomorrow, but not a date, I'd have to be pretty sure that she wouldn't bolt before I brought her around a bunch of car/internet geeks. :p

Benihana is a lot of fun, if you don't mind spending that much on a first date. Just be sure to get reservations.

There are always those ultimate pickup lines too... "Hey baby, does this rag smell like cloroform?" or "Nice shoes, wanna f**k?" :eek:

does she need hair-gel ?

Don't listen to Wookie.

My co-workers do not know what I'm reading here, so they think I might need to talk to the guys in the white coats. I can hardly type.

:D

Let them think that, they will be nicer to you, wouldn't want to "set you off" or make you "have an episode".

:p

Supe --
I thought you worked in government; your co-workers should either be on their five-and-one-half hour lunch breaks or asleep, no? :D

JP

Depends. It isn't "Rocky," (which was good). This is a character story. "Dirty Harry" or "The Good, Bad and Ugly" it isn't.

BTW Supes: I don't think "Million" qualifies as a first date movie. I'd try "Diary Of A Mad Black Woman." :D

I notice that "Inside Deep Throat" is playing, and so is "Ong-Bak - The Thai Warrior."

Show superhero acumen and take her to see "The Incredibles." Can't go wrong with that one.

Or do something unexpected: like nighttime skeet shooting.

the strip club thing worked for deniro in "taxi driver" with that blond from moonlighting...


unload for a couple reasons, its always time well spent, (the jenious recommends cleaning the house, thats funny), and there is the "strange factor", maintaining your gentleman's relish release on the same ol' slab is not an issue. getting a newbie bedded can get things moving too fast and next thing you know you are looking for the "next activity" like mentioned above. which maybe her getting dressed and heading to her car,,, so ive heard....

"aahh, what do you want to do know that i've jumped the start?"
two pump chumps don't often get a reentry invitation...

k911sc -- yeah, I tried very hard to avoid talking about Supe's wang and what he should do to/for it to prepare for the evening.

But 5-on-1 shouldn't take that long ... even if he thinks about baseball and taxes during the act; so he can put that residual energy to use and tidy up the place once he's cleaned himself up.

JP

How about the movie Sideways followed by a couple of glasses of Pinot Noir at a nice winebar/tapas place? Maybe drive the Porsche to Vancouver (B.C.) for a "liberalizing" date. Good luck and enjoy!

Sort of like it does in that song "Year of The Cat" by Al Stewart.

Island is on to something here. The best first dates involve something that gets the blood pumping, and the adrenaline flowing. Karting, Skydiving, rollercoasters, etc.. Usually, a bond is formed from sharing such "life threatening" experiences, and the odds turn in your favor. It also gives you something to talk about, and sparks conversation. I jump out of airplanes for fun, so I have first-hand accounts of this theory in action. :D

Don't forget to remove the passenger side door handle and once she notices she can't get out of the car it is EXTREMELY important to completely ignore her while you are driving ever further into the country with La Boehme at full volume . . .

This is the best thread I have read all week! You guys crack me up.

Go morbid: his and her blood transfusions. She'll love you long time -- like eternally.

The end of Supe's date:

http://forums.pelicanparts.com/uploa...1110578854.gif

JP

That gives me a great idea!

Take her to one of those shows with the knights and stuff.

Don't forget to do the chicken-skin on the face "Hello Clarisse" ala Cable Guy.

Her reaction to that should tell you if she's a keeper or not.

Either she runs away terrified and you tell her it was a joke, apoligize, make up, get back together, have a long and happy life. Or she laughs. (in which case you duck out the side exit, because something is so wrong with that) :D

Dude, the incredibles was freaking hilarious. When that kid was ripping through the forest I was laughing so hard I thought I was going to die.

It was great.

Supes leaving the scene... http://i.a.cnn.net/cnn/2005/LAW/03/1...car.turner.jpg

I knew you guys would not let me down. My house is two hours away and the date is less than three, so no time to tidy up. No reason to, either. But I would have time to run to the bathroom which I need to do anyway to rinse off the tear tracks on my face caused by the laughter. And as kc says, it's always time well spent.

I think Eric is correct about the fright thing and the effect it has on our genitals. So, perhaps I'll remove all unnecessary weight while I'm removing her interior door handle, and then treat I-405 rush hour as just like a busy track day with all those novices to pass.