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-   -   "Judge Orders Schiavo Feeding Tube Removed" - How do you guys feel about this? (http://forums.pelicanparts.com/off-topic-discussions/211677-judge-orders-schiavo-feeding-tube-removed-how-do-you-guys-feel-about.html)

RickM 03-18-2005 11:18 AM

"Judge Orders Schiavo Feeding Tube Removed" - How do you guys feel about this?
 
Maybe it's because I have a daughter but I can't believe that this decision is soley up to the husband. He has refused a request and major money (up to $10 mil) to relinquish guardianship. He states that she didn't want to survive with the use extraordinary assistance.
Was there a living will? I don't know. I haven't seen any mention of one.

In seeing this woman react when with her parents I can't help put myself in their place. Totally heart wrenching. I'd take my daughter in almost any condition.

Thoughts?

http://story.news.yahoo.com/news?tmpl=story&cid=514&e=1&u=/ap/20050318/ap_on_re_us/brain_damaged_woman_49

stevepaa 03-18-2005 11:22 AM

What have your parents told you? Mine says to pull the plug as soon as I get there. I will do it for him.
For my wife, yes.
For my children, I am not sure.

RallyJon 03-18-2005 11:47 AM

I'm not sure I like the idea of letting her starve to death. That's the part that I find unpleasant. Once the difficult but necessary decision has been made, they should euthanize her in a more humane way.

I watched my mother and her sister hesitate way too long in removing life support from my grandmother. My grandmother had specifically and thoroughly communicated in writing and verbally what she wanted, but her daughters stood there for days like zombies, unable to be the first to say, "do it". I hope I have the courage to make that call for my family, and I hope they have the courage to make that call for me.

mikester 03-18-2005 11:51 AM

It is a rough situation to understate it...

Just like you unless you make legal provisions your wife has power of attorney over you and you over her. Not my parents, not her parents and I wouldn't want it that way. If I am incapacitated I trust my wife and I have seen how she would handle it (because she did with her father), she treated him with dignity and respect and allowed him to keep his as best she could. He did however handle his living will and such much better than this young woman had at the time of her brain damage. She had no legal papers drawn up to state how she would want to be handled so it is soley up to her husband who has power of attorney over her.

This has been going on for 14 years now where he and the parents have been fighting about her life. There have been alegations from the parents of abuse that were not able to be proven in court. Time and time again the husband wins in court but the local or now NATIONAL legislature are taking up the case themselves. This case has already been decided in a court of law - is that not good enough? No, I suppose not if the parents are not happy with the outcome.

I am a parent and I would hate to be in this situation.

I cannot understand the husband's energy level to have been able to fight her parents for 14 years. Maybe he truely loves her and wants to take care of what he feels she would have wanted (since there is no documentation as to what she would have wanted). The parents genuinely believe that she could get better...but from the husband's perspective how could he move on with his life having abandoned her into her parents care. I think he's already got another woman on the hook and is waiting to complete this process before he marrys her.

It's rough to say the least.

mikester 03-18-2005 11:52 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by RallyJon
I'm not sure I like the idea of letting her starve to death. That's the part that I find unpleasant. Once the difficult but necessary decision has been made, they should euthanize her in a more humane way.

I watched my mother and her sister hesitate way too long in removing life support from my grandmother. My grandmother had specifically and thoroughly communicated in writing and verbally what she wanted, but her daughters stood there for days like zombies, unable to be the first to say, "do it". I hope I have the courage to make that call for my family, and I hope they have the courage to make that call for me.

Unfortunately the law does not provide for any more humain way.

RallyJon 03-18-2005 11:53 AM

Quote:

I think he's already got another woman on the hook and is waiting to complete this process before he marrys her.
If she's stayed "on the hook" for 14 years she must be quite a woman.

RickM 03-18-2005 12:05 PM

I was the decision maker for my mom. A responsibility that's hard to be proud of (in a way). However, it was very clear on what she wanted..in fact written in a legal document. But in this case it's not clear or at least not mentioned. Could he be just saying this? Hurts to see that the parents have zero say if this is the case.

RickM 03-18-2005 12:12 PM

Well, looks like it's a done deal. At least for now.

"Brain-Damaged Woman's Feeding Tube Removed" http://story.news.yahoo.com/news?tmpl=story&cid=514&e=1&u=/ap/20050318/ap_on_re_us/brain_damaged_woman

911S Targa 03-18-2005 12:13 PM

Quote:

I cannot understand the husband's energy level to have been able to fight her parents for 14 years.

Understand, that once she dies, the husband receives a insurance settlement check for 1 million dollars, or 10 ( I dont remember)

RickM 03-18-2005 12:15 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by 911S Targa
Understand, that once she dies, the husband receives a insurance settlement check for 1 million dollars, or 10 ( I dont remember)
He was also offered $10 mill to hand guardianship over to her parents. He refused.

911S Targa 03-18-2005 12:16 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by RickM
He was also offered $10 mill to hand guardianship over to her parents. He refused.
Because he`s waiting for the insurance settlement. He`s never wanted her parents to have control.

RallyJon 03-18-2005 12:19 PM

I think most of the controversy here comes from the appearance of sentience. Some people just can't get beyond the fact that a person appears to be smiling and looking at them. If her eyes were closed and she never moved, this likely would have been settled ages ago.

amity914 03-18-2005 12:23 PM

I have personally worked with the medically fragile for 4 years. It is possible to have a quality of life with a feeding tube, it is not with a respirator. I think that it is cruel to let someone starve to death, but I think that it is okay to remove a respirator.

HIEDI

island911 03-18-2005 12:37 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by RickM
He was also offered $10 mill to hand guardianship over to her parents. He refused.
Yikes! on the surface, that says a lot.

I've got to say, if I was living (scratch that) existing, in a hospital, for years, with some dumb-ass joker grin stuck to my vegitative face . . .I think that I would be pissed if my wife took the 10mil to leave me that way.

Long, drawn-out partial existence in a hospital. ..WHAT A ShlTTy way to go.

amity914 03-18-2005 12:38 PM

Most of the insurance money will go directly to the attorneys

911S Targa 03-18-2005 12:38 PM

http://www.terrisfight.org/

Evans, Marv 03-18-2005 12:45 PM

Of course different people have different ideas about it, and I think it would be hard for me if I were in a situation where I had to make a decision whether to remove the feeding tube or not. But, speaking for myself, no way would I want to spend anywhere hear 14 years living like that without the prospect of improvement. In addition to having such a negative impact on wife and family (which isn't much), I'd consider sleeping in peace a better alternative.

Burnin' oil 03-18-2005 12:50 PM

The last thing I would want would be for my wife to regain consciousness and tell the world how I put her in the coma in the first place . . .

RallyJon, the"appearance of sentience" describes many people, does it not?

stomachmonkey 03-18-2005 12:53 PM

No one has the right to judge anyone or decide for those faced with this kind of decision, especially when it comes to your children.

My wife and I had a decision to make and we made it, wasn't easy but you do the best that you can and hope to he11 you can live with it. And you do, every day, every minute and every second.

Until you've been there no one has a right to judge.

This thread should go away.

stevepaa 03-18-2005 01:01 PM

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Terri_Schiavo

unclear on any insurance, and she is not in a coma, but I understand what you mean.

man, this is disconcerting.


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