Daily driver murdered

[Hetmann]

Well, I'm driving the SC everywhere now. Good thing that the weather is nice. Yesterday, my nephew (age 19) was driving my truck and totaled it. It was old, so I had dropped collision coverage. He's a good kid and wants to "pay" for it, but I know he and his mom can't afford it. He's staying with me doing odd jobs this summer to have a little money to take back to college in the fall.

I was willing to accept the risk when I dropped collision coverage because the truck is old and pretty much fully depreciated and I'm a pretty sane driver (i.e. old guy putting along). I never thought to upgrade the coverage when he came to stay with us. The truck was mechanically sound and didn't really need anything. I wasn't planning on replacing it anytime soon.

Anyway, what do you all think is fair? Should I just eat it. Should I take it out of his hide when I know it will wipe him and his mom out. Should I let him pay some reasonable "deductible"?

Other fact... He was at fault and got the ticket. I'm sure that will cost him a wad.

[id10t]

Have him buy or cook you a nice steak dinner, and he has to wash/wax and change the oil on the replacement at least twice in the first year you have it. Accidents happen, be glad no one was hurt...

[DaveE]

That's tough, sorry. Look at the bright side though. He's got you driving your SC every day.

[notfarnow]

Only loan what you're willing to lose.

When you loan someone something, YOU are taking a risk. It doesn't always work that way in practice, but ultimately I think it was up to you to either keep it fully insured or not loan it out and risk losing it. It really sucks, and I wouldn't want to be in your position or your nephew's.

If he's staying with you, maybe get him to work it off? Paint your house or something? On the upside, the kid has surely learned a lesson about borrowing things.

Reminds me of the Pelicanite who borrowed the snowmobile and wrecked it. Whatever happened with that?

[Moses]

He's family. The truck is gone. Be gracious. Any other approach and some how YOU will end up being the a-hole.

[mschuep]

I like the steak dinner idea...gives you both a chance to shoot the breeze and then he knows your not real pissed about it...working on the new car a little will help him appreciate why you don't want to ruin one.

[911 Rod]

Is he not working for you?
Paying him?
I could be wrong but employers don't usually ask employees to pay for things they damage.
Fire. maybe. Pay?

[elwood-914]

That's a tough situation.....on one hand you want a young man to be responsible but then he is family and that is the most important. He is family, you don't want to cause rifts in family. Just glad he is alright. I would let it go. Just go with the heart.

[BGCarrera32]

He's family, be thankful he wasn't killed. On the other hand your truck was by admission old and obviously not worth very much if you dropped coverage. Go find another that needs work or a clutch or something if you're a DIY type guy; sit down with him and his mom and just say that he will be expected to help yank an engine and change a clutch or whatever it needs within reason and he won't be payed; but he'll likely learn something in the process and be more responsible with other people's stuff after he scrapes his knuckles up on a few rusty bolts. Staying mad won't do much good...try to turn it into something positive. Once you feel he has worked it off don't bring it up ever again.

[bigchillcar]

i'm sure he feels awful..he's young and he's family..i'd let it go, too..
ryan

[911 Rod]

Was this a $1000 truck or a $10,000 truck?

[RickM]

Originally posted by Hetmann

Anyway, what do you all think is fair? Should I just eat it. Should I take it out of his hide when I know it will wipe him and his mom out. Should I let him pay some reasonable "deductible"?

Other fact... He was at fault and got the ticket. I'm sure that will cost him a wad.

As part of his job he should part out any salvagable pieces and sell for you on Ebay. Then at the end of the summer give him part or all of the proceeds. Hopefully a lesson will be learned.

Glad he's OK.

[artplumber]

Why don't you ask him what/how he'd pay you back. I'm sure you can come up with some sort of hybrid plan that will enable him to pay (assuaging (sp) his guilt), but not bankrupt him or his family.

[austin552]

Just eat it and don't let him take the SC.

[azasadny]

Originally posted by Moses
He's family. The truck is gone. Be gracious. Any other approach and some how YOU will end up being the a-hole.

Yep!!

[motion]

I cannot believe what I'm hearing in this thread. The kid totals your truck and you want to be gracious about it??? You must be kidding me. Today's society encourages too much of this crap. He takes your truck out, he's an adult, he's responsible for it. If he damages it, he needs to pay for it or fix it, just like any man would be expected to do. Do the right thing for this young man... teach him how to be a man and be responsible for his actions.

[HardDrive]

Counter point.

Let it go.

[Rick Lee]

Any chance it was the other driver's fault?

[legion]

Between Motion's and HardDrive's posts, that's really the dilemma. Do you teach him a hard life lesson, one that most kids of his generation may never learn? (And possibly ruin the relationship.) Or do you let it go?

Do you want to be the cool uncle?

Are you comfortable with the possible anger he might have if you make him pay for it, even if it is probably better in the long run?

[Rick Lee]

Actually, how can you make him pay for it? What leverage do you have?