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First off, Happy birthday Dave!
Second, I can tell you it gets better with time. About 6 years ago, I was finalizing my divorce, hating my job in the IT industry, and felt like I was going nowhere. I found a great woman who was also going through a divorce, and immidiately we connected, better yet, I loved her kids, and they thought I was great too. After a year or so, she became pregnant again by her ex-husband.... I found rock bottom, the end of my rope, what ever you want to call it. I turned to alcohol and cocaine, probably the worst move ever! I quit my job as I didnt want to do anything other than lay around the house. I would sleep til 4 in the afternoon, then head to the bar. I would drink myself stupid, and try to "even out" by doing lines until 4 in the morning. I would get home and be tweeked until noon the next day, then it would all start over. I managed to do that for 2 years without killing myself, which is amazing considering how badly I was abusing my body. I eventually cut back on the coke because it was too expensive, and I gained about 20 pounds from all the alcohol. I then got a job as a bouncer in a bar so that forced me to quit drinking. About a year and a half ago, I met my Fiance. She is the best thing that ever happened to me! And she came into my life when I wasn't even looking for anyone. I had kinda written myself off as a waste, and worthless. She is able to show me that I was wrong! We now have a beautiful daughter who is 4 months old, and I dont think I would change my life for anything. If it tells you anything, one of the most meaningful songs for me is "Bless the Broken Road" by Rascal Flats, and I usually hate country music. Wow, sorry for rambling, I usually don't even tell anybody that part of my life.... but the moral is, don't get down on yourself. Look at all of it as a lesson that didn't kill you, keep a positive outlook, and everything will come around. Treat yourself well, and again, Happy Birthday! -Nick |
+1 NICK! Nice story! And happy birthday Dave. Just proves, when you think you've got it bad....just look around!! ;-)
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Happy Birthday - now get up off the couch and start doing something to better yourself. You aren't going to get a job hanging at the house and the only women you'll meet on the computer have the last name of .jpg.
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Happy birthday, Dave.
It sounds like you've got "baggage." Gosh, I was sitting on a barstool one day and this young fella, late 20's, is talking about some woman also in her late twenties who has a kid and was married. He's tempted since she's a nice woman and hot and likes him. "But.....(he looks into his beer) I just dunno...you know, she's been married before and the divorce was rough on her and.....well......it looks like she's got some baggage." The bartender, a tiny, hot, middle-aged biker spark-plug matriarch shot me a look that was one of the most amusing of my entire life. She and I are both in our late forties. Baggage? Yeah, sure, you want to just hold out for someone who has no baggage alright. Okay seriously. I was divorced a couple of years ago and now I'm finding that life can be a BLAST. I used to wish I would fall madly in lust/love with someone and ride that emotional rocketship. Now I hope to God that doesn't happen. If life isn't a full-flavor, thrill-a-minute, white-knuckle belly-laugh, then you're not following proper procedures. |
Thank you for all of your support and kind words! Things should get a little better after today.
Off to face the day... SmileWavy |
I have found things seem to work themselves out if you put the effort into them.
Plus, you are in CA and could drive the 84 everyday. I was in a bit of a bad mood this morning, so despite the nasty fog and 30ish temperatures, I drove the 911. Once I got on the road, BAM, I was in a much better mood! Those of you that keep em tucked away in the garage for weekends only, man, you are missing out. I hope the rest of your day goes well. Bill |
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Happy Birthday! No long term ideas here, but I have found a quick run over Mulholland down to PCH really puts things in perspective for me.
If you come out this way, give a call. You are welcome to the extra TV sitting in the garage. PM sent. :) |
My wife and I both downplay our birthdays. Heck, when you get to our age, lighting all those candles sets off the smoke detectors.
Happy birthday We find just going to the beach lifts our spirits immensely. |
Hi Dave. Happy Birthday. Sent you a PM here...
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Dave - for some reason, some of the saddest days for me have been around my birthday -- seems that the ones closest to me had a way of hurting me the most on my 'special day.'
Nowadays, I just wish that my birthday goes by unnoticed by most. The way I figure - as long as nothing bad happens that day, I'm set. Don't know if that help ya, but at least you know you're not the only one who does through stuff like you're going through now... -Z-man. |
Happy birthday! SmileWavy
If you've got time on your hands, why not try to bring a smile to someone else's life. The reflection often makes your own day a lot better. Offer to help out at a local soup kitchen, or maybe provide your IT experience to some local charities. My experience is that usally the people who are involved with charities are long on empathy and compassion, but lacking in technical know-how. It will keep your hands involved with technology and introduce you to new people. You'll be surprised who you meet when helping with a charity, people from all walks of life. Maybe even someone who can help you into a new job or a significant other. The best part is you'll discover that there are a lot of people who are a lot worse off then yourself, often for no fault of their own. So if misery loves company, you'll have lots. But better yet, when you get a smile and sincere "thank-you" for your contribution to them, it will do wonders for your own mood. Hey, today's the first day of the rest of your life. If you want to change something, now's the time to start! |
felt the same way last year on my 40th b-day. looked back on my life and felt depressed about so many choices i'd made. i stayed home, locked the doors, closed the blinds, turned off all the phones and had a 'pity party' for one. this year was better..it had it's ups and downs, some surprisingly wonder, some bitterly disappointing, but at least i decided to spend this past january's 41st b-day with family instead of alone. and besides, at our age, more often than not we CHOOSE our family. blood isn't always necessarily thicker than water - sometimes we have friends who are better people and supporters to us than 'blood family' anyway. consider that..it's the relationship that counts in the end..it's quality..not the bloodline.
happy birthday! ryan |
Following some of the advice here, I uncovered the 911 and went up to Kanan, went down to PCH, drove north for a little bit, came back via Topanga to try and avoid some of the 101 traffic and ended up behind a truck that would not pull over for any of us!
Anyway, I'm a bit better today. I think talking with my parents last night and posting this to all you helped. Thank you! I am off to a Chamber of Commerce mixer to try and drum up business. SmileWavy http://forums.pelicanparts.com/uploa...1170985784.jpg |
atta boy, dave! :)
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Sorry man, but I thought I saw this smilie a couple days ago and just had to use it. Great that you're feeling a bit better today. |
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Happy B-day Slodave from your cyber brother Slo-Bob. SmileWavy |
Happy Birthday Dave!
No advice, just enjoy what you have. |
Dave - Happy Brithday Buddy!
The upside...your on the right side of the grass! Just think, your birthday could be 9-11 (like mine) then everytime you want a day to be all about you, the only thing people will think about is that terrible day. Show your passport or your license at the airport and they mention it everytime. Whats worse, when someone forgets your birthday when it is 9-11. How could they! Don't they remember? No matter what, things can always be worse. Just be glad your name is not Jeffery Dahmer! |
Dave, HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!!! :D :D :D http://www.pelicanparts.com/support/smileys/wat6.gif http://www.pelicanparts.com/support/smileys/wat3.gif http://www.pelicanparts.com/support/...artysmiley.gif http://www.pelicanparts.com/support/smileys/drummer.gif http://www.pelicanparts.com/support/smileys/ura.gif http://www.pelicanparts.com/support/...verjaardag.gif
Sorry about the downer day. I think birthdays can sometimes make us sit back and take stock of our lives and how we perceive them to be. Remember, we tend to be our own worst critics too (I know I am). Dave, you're a good guy and a true pleasure to be around. I mean that. Keep your chin up and surround yourself with friends. Heck, if you feel up to it, get your a$$ up early Saturday morning and meet me down here in Irvine at Cars & Coffee. We can ogle a couple hundred great sports cars of all kinds and then maybe grab a quick breakfast. I'm sure Chris would be up for it and maybe a few of the rest of us here in SoCal. :D |
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