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sammyg2 08-21-2007 07:25 AM

Mr. Mackey: This is Mr. Venezuela, school janitor, M'Kay. He's the person who has to clean up when some trickster drops a dook in the wrong toilet. Mr. Venezuela makes six bucks an hour at best, M'kay. He's got three kids at home, he's got a car that barely works, he's gotta clean up puke with saw dust, M'Kay. Then he walks into the boys' room and sees a big meaty chud staring him in the face. So when you crapped in that urinal, M'Kay, you might has well have just dropped your pants and laid a turd right on Mr. Venezuela's head.

Mr. Mackey: M'Kay, you all might think that dropping a dook in the urinal is a victimless crime, M'Kay! because SOMEONE had to walk into the bathroom…drop their pants…turn around…maybe spread their butt cheeks apart with their hands…and squeeze out a choclate hot dog.
After having to wake up early, you know? There's NO coffee in the teacher's lounge, and then you walk into the bathroom to just find a big dook laying there in the urinal! Like it's laughing at you!
Mr. Mackey: Excuse me, can we get back to the issue please? You all don't seem to understand how serious this is. Now who made dookie in the urinal?

One of you thought it'd be funny to drop your pants, and drop a nice mud monkey in the urinal. Jimbo: He's right! The turd could've been put in there to cover up 9/11!
Mr. Mackey: Who would take a crap in a urinal?

Trivia
All the euphemisms used for 'number two' in this episode:
deuce
poop
dump
dookey
crap
turd
chud
brown rag doll
poopscapade
chocolate hotdog
fudge dragon
mud monkey

legion 08-21-2007 07:29 AM

"I'm a clincally depressed fecalphiliac on prozac."

Porsche-O-Phile 08-21-2007 07:37 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by sammyg2 (Post 3437674)
Mr. Mackey: This is Mr. Venezuela, school janitor, M'Kay. He's the person who has to clean up when some trickster drops a dook in the wrong toilet. Mr. Venezuela makes six bucks an hour at best, M'kay. He's got three kids at home, he's got a car that barely works, he's gotta clean up puke with saw dust, M'Kay. Then he walks into the boys' room and sees a big meaty chud staring him in the face. So when you crapped in that urinal, M'Kay, you might has well have just dropped your pants and laid a turd right on Mr. Venezuela's head.

Mr. Mackey: M'Kay, you all might think that dropping a dook in the urinal is a victimless crime, M'Kay! because SOMEONE had to walk into the bathroom…drop their pants…turn around…maybe spread their butt cheeks apart with their hands…and squeeze out a choclate hot dog.
After having to wake up early, you know? There's NO coffee in the teacher's lounge, and then you walk into the bathroom to just find a big dook laying there in the urinal! Like it's laughing at you!
Mr. Mackey: Excuse me, can we get back to the issue please? You all don't seem to understand how serious this is. Now who made dookie in the urinal?

One of you thought it'd be funny to drop your pants, and drop a nice mud monkey in the urinal. Jimbo: He's right! The turd could've been put in there to cover up 9/11!
Mr. Mackey: Who would take a crap in a urinal?

Trivia
All the euphemisms used for 'number two' in this episode:
deuce
poop
dump
dookey
crap
turd
chud
brown rag doll
poopscapade
chocolate hotdog
fudge dragon
mud monkey

The analytical nature of your thesaurus is astonishing. I'm committing each of those to memory.



Begs the question - if someone drops the brown lump in the urinal, how do they wipe their ass? Or do they just skip that too?

widgeon13 08-21-2007 07:38 AM

This is all pretty disgusting but I always found great humor in the old "flaming bag of shlt" on the doorstep on Halloween. You know the one where the father comes out after hearing the doorbell, sees the bag on fire and immediately moves to stomp it out with his foot.

Still works today:D

That to me is good clean fun, this other stuff is just disgusting and immature.

craigster59 08-21-2007 07:40 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Hugh R (Post 3437098)
We had a mad crapper on National Treasure II a few months ago. Pretty sick stuff.

There was a serial crap smearer at Universal studios years ago. They stationed plainclothes security gaurds outside the restrooms and they would run a "check" after each person exited the toilet. They finally caught the guy (teamster driver). I was familiar with this guy and he seemed normal. Wouldn't shake his hand after that...:eek:

notfarnow 08-21-2007 08:01 AM

wow, I had no idea this was such awidespread phenomenon.

I wonder if there is a profile for the average "smearer", or if they come from all walks of life.

FWIW, There used to be a website called urinalpoop.com, but I'm at work so I won't check to see if it's still active.

LeRoux Strydom 08-21-2007 08:08 AM

Maybe the guy really had to take a dump right away, and all the stalls were occupied? What would you do with a major case of the stomach runs? I would do it in the sink before crapping in my pants if there is no available toilet, that's for sure. Think practical, guys!

Porsche-O-Phile 08-21-2007 10:08 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by notfarnow (Post 3437760)
wow, I had no idea this was such awidespread phenomenon.

I wonder if there is a profile for the average "smearer", or if they come from all walks of life.

FWIW, There used to be a website called urinalpoop.com, but I'm at work so I won't check to see if it's still active.

Try ratemypoo.com

Tasty stuff.

notfarnow 08-21-2007 10:12 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Porsche-O-Phile (Post 3438002)
Try ratemypoo.com

Tasty stuff.

I think I saw that on cruel.com. Lots of wacky stuff there.

Porsche-O-Phile 08-21-2007 11:20 AM

Speaking of bathroom etiquette, WTF is with guys that have to hork a humongous loogie in the urinal every time they take a whiz? Is it like marking the pisspot somehow before you whiz into it anyway? I don't get the whole expectorating thing.

It's doubly gross when the guy leans over the bowl with his junk whipped out and "drools" one into the bowl. Don't they get worried about (1) having the spit land on their johnson or (2) having it cling to their chin?

Gross.

Highlander179 08-21-2007 12:23 PM

oops, sorry about that

tab tanner 08-21-2007 12:47 PM

I had a friend back in collage that took thing's a little to far. He had a party and someone pissed in his rubber tree plant and killed it. After a few weeks of asking around he found out who did it and went to there house and took a crap in the tank of the toilet. He called it (top shelving) it had to be the sickest thing you could think of. My friendship with him was never the same!!!!

Tim Hancock 08-21-2007 02:10 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by tab tanner (Post 3438311)
I had a friend back in collage that took thing's a little to far. He had a party and someone pissed in his rubber tree plant and killed it. After a few weeks of asking around he found out who did it and went to there house and took a crap in the tank of the toilet. He called it (top shelving) it had to be the sickest thing you could think of. My friendship with him was never the same!!!!


Tab, all I can say is that in college many nasty things are done in the name of fun. I won't go into the details as this crowd does not seem to have a sense of humor for some of these college shenanigans :D

In college I drove semi-truck for a friends dad's business hauling treated sewage sludge to farm fields to be spread as fertilizer. Lets just say that not too many practical jokes got pulled on me because payback is a beotch. ;):D

slodave 08-21-2007 02:32 PM

Ah college. I woke up one morning and found that a couple of persons had piled horse and cow manure along with hay, half way up the door to our student apartment - and since the door opened in.... Fortunately, I did not sleep at home that night and averted a nasty wake up call. Maintenance gave us a wheel barrow and a shovel.

juanbenae 08-21-2007 04:52 PM

the pooper just missed out on the upper decker point? maybe

T$

legion 08-21-2007 05:08 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Hugh R (Post 3437098)
We had a mad crapper on National Treasure II a few months ago. Pretty sick stuff.

Quote:

Originally Posted by craigster59 (Post 3437714)
There was a serial crap smearer at Universal studios years ago. They stationed plainclothes security gaurds outside the restrooms and they would run a "check" after each person exited the toilet. They finally caught the guy (teamster driver). I was familiar with this guy and he seemed normal. Wouldn't shake his hand after that...:eek:

Maybe it's a teamster thing?

Tobra 08-21-2007 05:54 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by livi (Post 3437201)
Maybe he was severely delusional from the lack of oxygen to his brain due to a seriously decompensated heart failure.. ;)

Markus, a plausable, well reasoned explanation. Maybe he was just an ******* though, lot of that going around too.

SlowToady 08-21-2007 07:42 PM

Here at Uni. we had a rather nice looking female drop a deuce in the sink of the lobby bathroom. She was a super hott twin, but I could never look at her the same after that.

At a frat party, a (drunken) girl used the restroom, and cleaned herself with the house owner's shirts!

Jim Bremner 08-21-2007 08:14 PM

back when I was racing karts, a GOOD freind of mine told me that he wanted to go out on the track @ night and leave a "pile" on the line out of a blind corner for the first person out for morning practice



and just for kicks, prior to doing the "upper deck" you "dry dock" a load

you turn the water off, flush as much as you can, crap.clean up and leave the dry docked turd.

before it can be flushed someone needs to get too close to comfort to turn the water back on:eek:

Tim Hancock 08-22-2007 03:58 AM

"Dry dock" "top shelving" "upper deck".........:D:D


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