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Registered User
Join Date: Jul 2003
Posts: 4,247
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Horizon Foods Solicitors. - Parking in my Driveway
Can't seem to get these M-fers out of my driveway.
1 month ago, I come home and he's trying to pitch some cod fish to my wife. I almost took that cod and shoved it up his A$$. today , i get a ring at the door, i open it and i see another salesman from Horizon foods, his truck again parked in my driveway. I told him to get his truck out of my driveway or I'm calling the police. I really need to get a NO SOLICITING sign. how annoying is it for people to try and sell you their **** in your own home. the junk mail is already bad enough. Now i have to deal them in person. What's next, i come home and someone's in my kitchen??? 
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11-08-2007, 09:27 AM
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Dog-faced pony soldier
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You could always invest in an 8' high CMU wall. . .
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A car, a 911, a motorbike and a few surfboards Black Cars Matter |
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11-08-2007, 09:32 AM
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Registered
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Just engage the next person in a political discussion and I'm sure your house will be purged from all sales lists.
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2022 BMW 530i 2021 MB GLA250 2020 BMW R1250GS |
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11-08-2007, 09:32 AM
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drag racing the short bus
Join Date: May 2002
Location: Location, Location...
Posts: 21,983
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Do your vegetarian act for him.
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The Terror of Tiny Town |
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11-08-2007, 09:34 AM
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Registered User
Join Date: Jul 2003
Posts: 4,247
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I feel kinda bad now because I gave the guy a hard time. I realize he was just doing his job. He must have apologized about 15 times..
it's really their company policy and aggressive marketing tactics. |
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11-08-2007, 09:37 AM
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Registered User
Join Date: Jul 2003
Posts: 4,247
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Quote:
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11-08-2007, 09:38 AM
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Dog-faced pony soldier
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You could always mail some fish (preferably long-dead) to their corporate office.
Do that once a day for about two months. You'll probably be off the list.
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A car, a 911, a motorbike and a few surfboards Black Cars Matter |
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11-08-2007, 09:39 AM
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Platinum Member
Join Date: Jul 2001
Location: Leave the gun. Take the cannoli.
Posts: 21,026
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Ask to see the township permit that allows him to sell in your community. When he can't produce it, tell him if you see his truck again, he will be reported to the authorities. Works for me.
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11-08-2007, 09:40 AM
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Registered User
Join Date: Jul 2003
Posts: 4,247
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Quote:
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11-08-2007, 09:40 AM
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Registered
Join Date: Nov 2002
Location: Rogue Valley, Oregon
Posts: 1,736
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I asked one of these dudes, "why would I buy meat off of some guys truck?" He acted offended and stomped off in a meladrmatic way. It was classic.
Troy
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Troy Past: 1975 911S Silver Anniversary-rebuilt and sublime. Past: 1988 Carrera-backdated with a 3.6 and all the goodies. Present: 2011 GMC 2500HD with the 6.0 & 4x4!, 2004 Toyota Sequoia (wife's) |
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11-08-2007, 09:46 AM
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No Band
Join Date: May 2007
Location: The Casino
Posts: 3,901
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Just buy some fish man, he is trying to earn a living the only way he knows how... poor guy...
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"HEY A$$MAN!!!" 
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11-08-2007, 06:31 PM
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Registered
Join Date: May 2002
Location: Portland, Oregon
Posts: 12,665
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I know your frustration but I think back to my childhood when the Fish Truck made it's appearance every Thursday in my neighborhood. He honked his horn, the housewifes came out and haggled over the catch of the day. Fresh, good and reliable. Brought to your doorstep. What could be better?
If you do not want him coming to your house, tell him to leave.
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Harry 1970 VW Sunroof Bus - "The Magic Bus" 1971 Jaguar XKE 2+2 V12 Coupe - {insert name here} 1973.5 911T Targa - "Smokey" 2020 MB E350 4Matic |
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11-08-2007, 08:15 PM
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Registered
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Options:
1. Keep some Morman literature by the door. When you are next confronted by a salesman greet him "The Lord has brought you to my door". Begin to enthusiastically (and I mean enthusiastically) evangelise. Pursue him as he tries to leave. 2. Open the door and silently listen to his pitch. Remain completely expressionless. When he pauses, turn your head and shout back into the house "Honey, he's back. Get my gun." 3. Begin to frenetically sign to him, feigning complete deafness. 4. Stand close to him. Real close. As in really, really close.
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(As for) Michael Moore:Calling that lying liberal POS propaganda a documentary is like calling PARF the library of congress. I knew it would happen, just not so soon........... Last edited by aap1966; 11-08-2007 at 11:04 PM.. |
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11-08-2007, 11:02 PM
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Slackerous Maximus
Join Date: Apr 2005
Location: Columbus, OH
Posts: 18,191
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A simple, gentleman's conversation explaining your displeasure, while he stares down the business end of a Ruger Blackhawk .44 will probably clear this mis-understanding up in a jiffy!
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2022 Royal Enfield Interceptor. 2012 Harley Davidson Road King 2014 Triumph Bonneville T100. 2014 Cayman S, PDK. Mercedes E350 family truckster. |
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11-08-2007, 11:17 PM
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Registered
Join Date: Jul 2005
Location: Seattle
Posts: 5,824
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Look out the window before you answer the door.
Keep a bottle of fake blood and a butcher knife handy. Next time you see the truck, smear the "blood" on the blade, and all over you. Open the door, and ask him to help you dispose of the body... 
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'85 911. White - 53,000 miles bought 3-16-07. "Casper" '88 924S. Blue - 120k miles bought with 105k miles. '94 968 Coupe - White - 108,000 miles bought 9-28-17 '09 Cayman - Grey - bought 9-8-20 |
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11-08-2007, 11:48 PM
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Registered
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Quote:
O.K......, that's better than my ideas.
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(As for) Michael Moore:Calling that lying liberal POS propaganda a documentary is like calling PARF the library of congress. I knew it would happen, just not so soon........... |
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11-09-2007, 12:47 AM
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Registered User
Join Date: Jul 2003
Posts: 4,247
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ha ha ha
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11-09-2007, 05:28 AM
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Evolved
Join Date: Jan 2007
Posts: 3,338
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Quote: "I come home and he's trying to pitch some cod fish to my wife."
__________________ He's probably there to see your wife...the fish story is a ruse!
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Don't fear the reaper. |
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11-09-2007, 05:33 AM
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GAFB
Join Date: Dec 1999
Location: Raleigh, NC, USA
Posts: 7,842
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I'd be more worried if the wife was trying to pitch the cod fish to him.
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Several BMWs |
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11-09-2007, 05:51 AM
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Band.
Join Date: Dec 2003
Location: Denver, CO
Posts: 13,333
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Invite him in and tell him about Jesus. Waste his whole morning. YOu'll never see him again.
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1983 SC Coupe 1963 BMW R60/2 1972 Triumph Tiger 1995 Triumph Daytona SuperIII |
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11-09-2007, 06:13 AM
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Only Porsche
Only bike
