T-boy Boudreaux finally decides to take a vacation. He books himself on a
Caribbean cruise and proceeds to have the time of his life until the boat sank.



He found himself swept up on the shore of an island with no other people, no

supplies.. Nothing. Only bananas and coconuts.



After about four months, he is lying on the beach one day when the most

gorgeous woman he has ever seen rows up to him. In disbelief, he asks her,

'Where you come from? How you get here?'



'I rowed over from the other side of the island,' she says. 'I landed here

when my cruise ship sank.'



'Dat's amazing,' he says. 'You was really lucky to have a rowboat wash up

wit you.'



'Oh, this?' replies the woman. 'I made the rowboat out of raw material found

on the island. I whittled the oars from gum tree branches; I wove the bottom

from palm branches; and the sides and stern came from a Eucalyptus tree.'



'But ... but .. dat's impossible,' stutters T-boy. 'You ain't had no tools

or hardware. How you manage dat?'



'Oh, no problem,' replies the woman. 'On the South side of the island, there

is a very unusual strata of alluvial rock exposed. I found if I fired it to a

certain temperature in my kiln, it melted into forgeable ductile iron. I used

that for tools and used the tools to make the hardware.' T-boy is stunned.



'Let's row over to my place,' she says.



After a few minutes of rowing, she docks the boat at a small wharf. As T-boy

looks onto shore, he nearly falls out of the boat. Before him is a stone walk

leading to an exquisite bungalow painted in blue and white. While the woman ties

up the rowboat with an expertly woven hemp rope, he can only stare ahead,

dumbstruck.



As they walk into the house, she says casually, 'It's not much, but I call

it home. Sit down, please. Would you like to have a drink?'



'No, no tank you,' he says, still dazed. 'Can't take no mo of dat coconut

juice.'



'It's not coconut juice,' the woman replies. 'I built a still. How about a

Pina Colada?'



Trying to hide his continued amazement, he accepts, and they sit down on her

hand-woven couch to talk. After they have exchanged their stories, the woman

announces, 'I'm going to slip into something more comfortable. Would you like to

take a shower and shave? There is a razor upstairs in the cabinet in the

bathroom.'



No longer questioning anything, T-boy goes into the bathroom. There, in the

cabinet, is a razor made from a bone handle. Two shells honed to a hollow-ground

edge are fastened on to its end inside of a swivel mechanism. 'WOW! dis woman is

amazing,' he muses, 'what gonna be next?'



When he returns, she greets him wearing 'nothing but vines' strategically

positioned, and smelling faintly of gardenias. She beckons for him to sit down

next to her.



'Tell me,' she begins suggestively, slithering closer to him, 'We've been

out here for a really long time. I know you've been lonely. There's something

I'm sure you really feel like doing right now, something you've been longing for

all these

months. You know...'



She stares into his eyes. He can't believe what he's hearing!



'You mean ...', he swallows excitedly, 'We gonna watch the LSU game from

here'?:D

Hate to keep bursting your bubble but the 2003 Nat Championship trophy resides in Baton Rouge, Louisiana. Soon it will have company in the trophy case. I know this is hard for you to accept, but it is fact none the less.

As for the cupcake league (PAC 10), even your greatest supporter, Kirk Herbstreet, took the trojan out of his mouth long enough to admit that the SEC is the toughest in the land. I can admit that ya'll have some hot cheerleaders, but hard nosed football, that's like totally non existent dude.

USC even b!tched up for the bowl game. They could have had some real competition but instead chose Illinois. The reason for this, as I put my Nostradamus hat on, is so that, since Ill beat OSU in the pillow fight league, should USC win, they can claim some kind of BS shared championship again. I guess that beats working for it.

PS Is it true that Heismann Trophy winner, Reggie Bush took a pay cut to go to the NFL?

By the way, Reggie spent half of last season running to the sideline to turn it up, like he did in the cupcake league, only to get waxed. He could not have pulled that in the SEC, more a less in the NFL. Bush will be traded at the end of next year. The show pony can't get it done against real competition.

Great, all this from the man that hates Viet Vets.

Mule Quote
"You wouldn't have to wonder. My friends at TVA used to joke that blacks were the most insulated from trouble. After that it was a toss up between women & Viet Nam vets. For some reason at TVA, being a VN vet was worth a lot. We always said that if you were a black, female, Viet Nam vet, you could take a dump on the president's desk & he'd wipe for you."


Mule Quote
My opinion may be softening towards Herbstreit. Instead of me praying for him to choke to death on a horse ****. tonight I'll ask God to let him choke to deat on Les Miles' ****. Amen

Your life must be really dull, huh?

Not dull at all, been places, done things, go places all the time, you on the other hand can't post more than just bashing Viet Vets and PAC 10. That must be dull. You should apologize to all Viet Vets, and especially the one that took your place.
Dull is when you have nothing to do but start another thread bashing some other group.

Never once bashed any vet. You're just too stupid to comprehend English.

Mule
"You wouldn't have to wonder. My friends at TVA used to joke that blacks were the most insulated from trouble. After that it was a toss up between women & Viet Nam vets. For some reason at TVA, being a VN vet was worth a lot. We always said that if you were a black, female, Viet Nam vet, you could take a dump on the president's desk & he'd wipe for you."


"We always said"

Stupid?

You might want to look into some reading comprehension classes. Maybe they can help you see that my statement is not a slap at blacks, or women, or VN vets. Maybe with help, you can get beyond what has been apparently a major issue for your meager consciousness to digest.

I guess it depends on what the definition of "we" is.

I think it depends more on whether you can discern the meaning of a sentence.

I think I understand that paragraph. You don't seem to understand what you post, nothing new.

So, moving on, what number will you be wearing in this game, just in case I turn it on, I would like to see what position you play?

Mule
"since Ill beat OSU in the pillow fight league, should USC win, they can claim some kind of BS shared championship again. I guess that beats working for it."

Come on now, play nice.
If talking crap about a different conference or team makes them feel superior, then we should ignore them and let them live out their little fantasy.
Sure it's pitiful, but maybe that's all they have.

Quit the mushrooms dude, you're losing it!

Oh, the joy in Duckville, as they beat up on South Florida...but there is a bitterness to the joy. You see, the Ducks lost their last game of the season...to the OREGON STATE BEAVERS! :D

Hey Sammy, and you too RoachBeGone, happen to see how the SEC is doing?

No, are you in one of the games?

All of them! I play every position on every team! Got any other stupid questions you need help with?

Man, this thread went South fast...:(

Just heard the opening salvo. Herbstreit and another nimrod babbling on about USC being the best in the country. Except for the plucky Cardinal? Mark these words, unless Illinois stomps USC, ABC/ESPN will be yammering endlessly about how "by the end of the season, USC was playing the best football in the country."