I <3 PJ O'Rourke

[legion]

http://news.yahoo.com/s/weeklystandard/20080131/cm_weeklystandard/lettertooureuropeanfriends

Some gems from this article:

After the events of the 20th century, God, quite reasonably, left Europe. But He's still here in the United States. The majority of Americans are Christians, and Christians can be divided into two kinds, the kind who think you should get Jesus and the kind who think Jesus is going to get you. Mike Huckabee is one of the latter. Then there are the Mormons such as Mitt Romney who believe some unusual things--things that no sensible European like Jean-Paul Sartre, Martin Heidegger, Benito Mussolini, Karl Marx, Emanuel Swedenborg, or Cherie Blair would ever believe.
...
The Republicans will have a hard time coming up with someone who can't beat Hillary Clinton. But I don't put it past them. You may remember Senator Bob Dole in 1996.
...
Mitt Romney is supposed to be my own type of candidate, a true conservative. But Mitt was governor of Massachusetts. This is like applying to be pope and listing your prior job experience as "Chief Rabbi of Jerusalem."
...
Rudy Giuliani is a wonderful person to have around during a tragedy. His campaign promise is that there will be a tragedy every week.
...
Who else do the Democrats have? There is, of course, Nobel Peace Prize-winning Al Gore. May I ask you Europeans, are your Norwegians crazy? What does the Nobel Peace Prize have to do with global warming? Did Al forge a truce in the war with the penguins? I'm trying to lead a carbon-neutral lifestyle myself. I've given up cigars. I think Al Gore should give up blowing smoke out his .  .  .

John Edwards is a personal injury lawyer, the sort of fellow who covers North Carolina with billboards reading, "Y'all May Have Been Malpracticed on by a Doctor and Not Even Know It. Call (800) S-H-Y-S-T-E-R." One of the remaining virtues of European civilization is that you aren't overrun with his ilk. John Edwards should go sue Krispy Kreme doughnuts for making his supporters too fat to get into the voting booths.
...
Then there are the Democrats who're actually qualified to be president--Bill Richardson, Joe Biden, and Chris Dodd. All three have dropped out of the race. Before they did, they managed, between them, to raise almost $1,000 (2.79 euros) for their campaigns.

[cgarr]

I love this guy, One who is not afraid to call a spade a spade

[pwd72s]

He follows the pattern of many intelligent people...in his youth, he was very liberal. Now he's conservative.

[craigster59]

I've been a big fan of his since back in the day...

[silverc4s]

PJ 's description of the 930 Turbo he got to drive from coast to coast back in the day... "Ass engined Nazi slot car." This has become a pretty famous phrase, I even had a CA custom plate at one time that said, "AENSC"

[Shaun @ Tru6]

he's very funny on NPR's Wait Wait Don't Tell Me.

[azasadny]

I read every issue of the National Lampoon in the 70's and loved every one of them!

[RANDY P]

I have all his books. He's hillarious -- and smart..

rjp

[baldman]

His description of why Hillary won't win cracked me up!

The reason is not that she's a woman. The reason is that she's the particular woman who taught the 4th grade class that every man in America wished he were dead in. Hillary Clinton is Lucy holding the football for Charlie Brown. Hillary Clinton is "America's ex-wife."

[Seahawk]

Originally Posted by RANDY P

I have all his books. He's hillarious -- and smart..

rjp

Agreed. He also grew up rather poor. One of my favorite lines of his, I'll be paraphrasing, is that even though his family was poor, his Mother insisted they, "weren't poor enough not to be clean".

[RANDY P]

Originally Posted by Seahawk

Agreed. He also grew up rather poor. One of my favorite lines of his, I'll be paraphrasing, is that even though his family was poor, his Mother insisted they, "weren't poor enough not to be clean".

mine was the one about the USA participating with the UN is like Arnold Schwarzenegger working with pygmies...

the other one ws his description of Clinton:

"Bill, your GF is ugly, your wife is a ***** and your dog won't hunt.."

[Tobra]

Originally Posted by silverc4s

PJ 's description of the 930 Turbo he got to drive from coast to coast back in the day... "Ass engined Nazi slot car." This has become a pretty famous phrase, I even had a CA custom plate at one time that said, "AENSC"

I got a warning from Wayne for using that exact same euphemism, be warned, people are offended by the term"Nazi"

PJ pretty much kicks ass

[cgarr]

No Soup For You!!