22 ways to be a good Democrat

[Por_sha911]

22 WAYS TO BE A GOOD DEMOCRAT


1. You have to be against capital punishment, but support abortion on demand.

2. You have to believe that businesses create oppression and governments create prosperity.

3. You have to believe that guns in the hands of law-abiding citizens are more of a threat than nuclear weapons technology in the hands of Chinese and North Korean communists.

4. You have to believe that there was no art before federal funding.

5. You have to believe that global temperatures are more affected by soccer moms driving SUVs than by scientifically documented cyclical changes in the earth's climate.

6. You have to believe that gender roles are artificial, but being homosexual is natural.

7. You have to believe that the AIDS virus is spread by a lack of federal funding.

8. You have to believe that the same teacher who can't teach fourth graders how to read is somehow qualified to teach those same kids about sex.

9. You have to believe that hunters don't care about nature, but loony activists who have never been outside of San Francisco do.

10. You have to believe that self-esteem is more important than actually doing something to earn it.

11. You have to believe that Mel Gibson spent $25 million of his own money to make The Passion of the Christ for financial gain only.

12. You have to believe that the NRA is bad because it supports certain parts of the Constitution, while the ACLU is good because it supports certain parts of the Constitution.

13. You have to believe that taxes are too low, but ATM fees are too high.

14. You have to believe tha t Margaret Sanger and Gloria Steinem are more important to American history than Thomas Jefferson, Thomas Edison, and Alexander Graham Bell.

15. You have to believe that standardized tests are racist, but racial quotas and set-asides are not.

16. You have to believe that Hillary Clinton is normal and is a very nice person.

17. You have to believe that the only reason socialism hasn't worked anywhere it's been tried is because the right people haven't been in charge.

18. You have to believe that conservatives telling the truth belong in jail, but a liar and a sex offender belonged in the White House.

19. You have to believe that homosexual parades displaying drag, transvestites, and bestiality should be constitutionally protected, and manger scenes at Christmas should be illegal.

20. You have to believe that illegal Democratic Party funding by the Chinese government is somehow in the best interest to the United States .

21. You have to believe that it's okay to give federal workers the day off on Christmas Day, but it's not okay to say "Merry Christmas."

22. You have to believe that this message is part of a vast right wing conspiracy.

[Hugh R]

11. You have to believe that Mel Gibson spent $25 million of his own money to make The Passion of the Christ for financial gain only. This one is a non starter for me. Who cares what his reasons were. He's very religious I'm told, but compared to the others which are great, this one just pales. Its like a big so what?

[Racerbvd]

Originally Posted by Hugh R

11. You have to believe that Mel Gibson spent $25 million of his own money to make The Passion of the Christ for financial gain only. This one is a non starter for me. Who cares what his reasons were. He's very religious I'm told, but compared to the others which are great, this one just pales. Its like a big so what?

Just so people know what you arte talking about http://southpark.comedycentral.com/videos.jhtml?videoId=104244&episodeId=103880

[Porsche-O-Phile]

I actually agree with #5 and #9 to a point. Denying the impact of our irresponsible choices ("soccer moms in SUVs") is frankly pretty stupid.

With respect to #9, I think hunters don't give a rats ass about the environment beyond what it takes to promote their disgusting hobby and slake their blood lust. To be honest, I'd rather they stayed the hell out of the wilderness entirely, regardless of whatever "good intentions" they think they have.

#11 I think is mostly because Mel Gibson is a certifiable loon, but it's his money, he's entitled to waste it on whatever he wants I guess.

I'm pretty much with you on the rest of the list though.

[WI wide body]

Originally Posted by Porsche-O-Phile

I actually agree with #5 and #9 to a point. Denying the impact of our irresponsible choices ("soccer moms in SUVs") is frankly pretty stupid.

With respect to #9, I think hunters don't give a rats ass about the environment beyond what it takes to promote their disgusting hobby and slake their blood lust. To be honest, I'd rather they stayed the hell out of the wilderness entirely, regardless of whatever "good intentions" they think they have.

#11 I think is mostly because Mel Gibson is a certifiable loon, but it's his money, he's entitled to waste it on whatever he wants I guess.

I'm pretty much with you on the rest of the list though.

Jeff, you will probably enjoy this one that I heard a long time ago:

"The hunters shoot for sport...but the animals die in earnest."

[Porsche-O-Phile]

Well-put.

I get great enjoyment out of the outdoors and get it all by strict adherence to the "take only pictures, leave only footprints" policy. I get great satisfaction and enjoyment out of camping and hiking and seeing how things work in settings untouched by human intervention. As someone who is involved with designing and constructing habitats for people and building societies that are (hopefully) more sustainable, I learn a lot from this.

I certainly don't need to slaughter stuff while I'm out there just for kicks in order to get the enjoyment and satisfaction out of it. It's a shame some people feel they do.

[Nathans_Dad]

Slake their blood lust? LOL. I'm not a hunter, but do you "slake your blood lust" every time you pick up a nice juicy ribeye at your local Piggly Wiggly?

[Mule]

I am offended by the term Piggly Wiggly.

[dtw]

Fine, more of my deer chili for the rest of us...

[on2wheels52]

I assume not many cars are totalled out by deer in Long Beach (or motorcyclists).
Jim

[Tobra]

Friend of mine totalled a car, a mountain bike and a road bike when he hit a horse in Idaho. He bought the car back, put a new windshield in it and drove it for the first two years in podiatry school.

Originally Posted by Mule

I am offended by the term Piggly Wiggly.

Why, are you wiggly or piggly?

[Mule]

Both, so doubly offended!

[DanielDudley]

And being a good Republican means never having to say you are sorry.

Or Wrong.

Try that one on, I think you will like the fit.

[sammyg2]

23. You have to be a pickpocket with enough nerve to complain that the wallets you steal from the republicans don't have enough money in them to support you and your family in the lifestyle you are accustomed to.

[sammyg2]

Hay, did anyone else notice the Chnlove.com ad at the very bottom of this page?
LOL we can have all kinds of fun with that one at Wayne's expense, I can hear it now