Me: "What's the zip code here?" Kid at my door: "What???"

[LeeH]

There are traveling groups teenagers that claim to be selling magazines to raise money for "local" school sports teams. I've had several of them visit in the past few weeks.

When I open the door they always greet me with a friendly, "Hi! I'm John, Karen Smith's kid. We live just up the street. I'm selling magazines to raise money for my high school soccer team." To which I respond, "So, you live in the neighborhood?" They usually point in some random direction and say, "Yeah, at the top of the street," or something like that. The one last night said, "My mom told me to say she was sorry about her dog going in your yard the other day."

That's when I ask the killer question... "What's the zip code in this part of town?" I wish I had a camera to capture the looks on their little faces!

One asked me why would I do such a thing. "Well, because now that I know that you are lying to me I know I can't believe anything else you say. Have a nice day."

[Dantilla]

I like it.

The quickest way to get me to ignore someone is if they are dishonest with me.

[craigster59]

We get them dropped off in our neighborhood, inner city kids selling crappy candy at a 400% markup. Their spiel is "Buy my candy so I can go to Disneyland and stay out of gangs".

Excuse me, but how does a day at a theme park keep you out of a gang?

[Superman]

As many of you guys know, I worked at our state labor department. I administered and enforced some of Washington State's labor regs. Employment of minors is regulated. Now, some of you guys think regulations are always bad and I try to respect that but.....don't. Guys who will gather up a bunch of twelve year-olds and cart them around town in a van to hawk overpriced candy on heart-wrenching false pretenses until all hours of the night for their (the adult "business" owner) personal benefit should be shot dead. When we found these guys, we took the gloves off. We coordinate with the local police on those.

[speedracing944]

About 10 years ago there was a van driving down the interstate near Jansville WI which was packed full of traveling magazine selling kids. They were speeding and we being chased by the cops. The driver didn't have a licence to drive so they tried to switch drivers while driving down the interstate. In doing so the van slid and overturned throwing the kids out of the van onto the interstate at speed. IIRC there were only a couple of kids who survived.

I don't support organizations like this.

Speedy

[vash]

nice one Lee! my wife is too trusting. i will drop that one on the next kid that rings my door. they hang around Target in my neighborhood. just a sheet of paper, no credentials...they teach crime young these days.

[speedracing944]

http://www.travelingsalescrews.info/janesville_van_crash.html

Speedy

[Neilk]

Kids used to come to my old apartment asking to donate money for text books. I would ask them if they had a note from their Principal stating the goals of their fund raising or any kind of hand outs explaining what they were doing. "Surprisingly," none of them did. So I sent them on their way.

[Dantilla]

Originally Posted by Superman

When we found these guys, we took the gloves off. We coordinate with the local police on those.

Thank you.

[DonDavis]

Gold, Lee, that was gold!!

[MRM]

A few years ago they busted a ring like that in Minneapolis that was controlled by some street gang.

[Joeaksa]

Excellent idea!

[JeremyD]

I always ask them the name of the street they live on - but I like the zip code better.

My standard line for those hawking on the street corner/telemarketing/coming to my house is - I never buy ANYTHING from ANYBODY in this situation because I think it's dangerous (for the person, organization, or me). If more people followed my lead, nothing would be sold like this and the businesses/organizations would find a better way to sell their services/support/product.

[onewhippedpuppy]

The ones who claim to be earning money for some exotic trip, I always wonder "why should I buy you a trip when I can't afford one?" It's all BS, but still.......

[Dave L]

We dont really get kids but we get people trying to sell Natural Gas at "discount" rates. They come to the door, say their from the gas company and ask to see a recent bill. I always tell them to hold on, I close the door then go back to whatever I was doing.

[M.D. Holloway]

like when ypou would use a fake ID and the bouncer asks "OK, whats your sign?"

[Porsche-O-Phile]

Love it!

Pure brilliance - I'm committing that one to memory.

[vash]

i ALWAYS get the borderline homeless guy carrying around a gas can, at filling stations.

"can a i get a few buck for gas?" they never accept just letting me put a gallon into his empty can. what kinda idiot do i look like? (dont answer that)

[Dueller]

LOL.

I can see you going Pulp Fiction on 'em:

What's the zip code here?"

Kid at my door: "What???"

WHAT IS THE ZIP CODE HERE??????

What????

Where are you from?

What????

Do they speak English in What?

What????

English. Do you speak English in What?

What?????

SAY "WHAT" AGAIN. I DARE YOU, Mother fucher. Say "What" again...


And then go medieval on their azz

[dtw]

Originally Posted by vash

i ALWAYS get the borderline homeless guy carrying around a gas can, at filling stations.

"can a i get a few buck for gas?" they never accept just letting me put a gallon into his empty can. what kinda idiot do i look like? (dont answer that)

Sitting at a stop sign the other day, somebody started rapping on the window. WTF? I must have looked startled, when I rolled down the window the guy's going "You afraid of black people??" No...so he asks for money for transmission fluid. That was a new one on me.

Lee, I remember a guy asked me for some cash to pay the tow truck driver to unlock his Lexus (said he'd locked his keys in it). Asked him where it was. Jerked his thumb at a small parking lot behind him. Spotted a couple Lexi. Asked him which color his was. "**** YOU MAN" and that was the end of that...