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-   -   Am I being unreasonable? (http://forums.pelicanparts.com/off-topic-discussions/40439-am-i-being-unreasonable.html)

Planter91C2 05-16-2001 10:45 AM

Am I being unreasonable?
 
My wife wanted to take the p-car somewhere yesterday while I was still at work. I thought it wasn't a good idea because it would just be sitting in a very busy parking lot for most of the time. This discussion did not go very well. Do you let you wife take the car whenever she wants? I was called a chauvanist, is that true?

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Daryl 91C2 Targa

roGERK 05-16-2001 10:58 AM

Yeah, reckon you are being unreasonable - surely the car is meant to be used, and you have insurance?

If you really don't want the car to age, you should donate it to a museum and buy a 7 year old Chevy instead ;-)

- roGER

Sputterbug 05-16-2001 11:03 AM

Depends if you got the point across. I would not want the car sitting in a busy parking lot for a long time either. I avoid such trips, although not religiously - I'm not that obsessive. I don't like anybody driving my car, but I would allow my girlfriend to do so if she asked. However, there are guidelines for my own driving practices, and those should apply to anyone else in spades. If you wouldn't park in that lot, than neither should she. Assuming that's your only real concern, the "chauvinist" moniker is not appropriate.

FWIW.

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Roger
'85 Carrera 3.2 Coupe aka "Sputterbug"
http://sputterbug.com

Jdub 05-16-2001 11:43 AM

Oh this is going to be a hot thread!!!

My opinion? Yes, you are being unreasonable. She cannot possibly understand the absurd lengths those of us on this board go to to keep our Pcars out of danger. What she understands is that it is an (expensive) car that is meant to be driven. And she may also covet the thought of driving around in a Porsche, God bless her.

I would apologize, with flowers, and let her in on your psyche: how you love the car, the wrenching on it, how it de-stresses you, how you love the feel and power. You must make her understand the power it has on you, and how, for ONE SECOND you let that power overcome the more important power of the love between you two. She will love you for your honesty, your anxiety, your childlike infatuation, and mostly your apology, which in and of itself speaks volumes about modesty, morals, and responsibility.

My opinion only, but you have made a mistake that you might be able to leverage into a very positive result.

Jw

Decolliber 05-16-2001 11:47 AM

Just be glad you don't have a 17 year old son borrowing your 911. I do. But I drew the line at letting him take it to senior prom.

After my wife drives my A6, I find pistachio nut shells all over the place and the occasional twizzler on the leather seats. Grrrr... Last time she drove my Speedster replica (OK, its only a VW motor ...) she kept hitting reverse when downshifting from 3rd to 2nd. Horrible noise. It was hard not to cry.

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John C
1988 Carrera coupe
1957 Speedster replica
1997 A6 Avant

makaio 05-16-2001 01:09 PM

I have a solution to your problem. Get a pre-87 911 with the 915 tranny. My wife is scared to death of that mine. She loves riding in the car, but refuses to drive it. And she is mind boggled that I can stand to drive it with, how it shifts.

But realistically, as long as you have insurance, let her drive yours. You can always replace it if something does happen.

Just my 911 cents.

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Matt Chamblin
78 911 SC

Jim T 05-16-2001 01:16 PM

My opinion, yes, you are being unreasonable, and I would be kind of insulted if I were your wife (which would not be good, I look terrible in a dress).

Try looking at it from her side. She wants to drive the car, which technically belongs to both of you. She is your wife, not your daughter or your girlfriend. When you try to forbid her from doing something (anything), that never comes across very well. Not really how equals treat each other.

The reality is that it is just a car, being driven and parked in parking lots is what it does. That she wanted to drive it and park it in a parking lot doesn't seem like an unreasonable request to me.

Just my opinion.

rstoll 05-16-2001 01:28 PM

Jim T, don't be so hasty. Please post a pic of you in the dress and let us be the judge of whether you look bad in it. http://www.pelicanparts.com/ultimate/smile.gif

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Robert Stoll
83 SC
83 944

JackOlsen 05-16-2001 01:32 PM

I'd go for a sport clutch or a couple's therapist. Either ought to solve the problem.

Sport clutch is a lot cheaper.

[This message has been edited by JackOlsen (edited 05-16-2001).]

Rustbucket 05-16-2001 01:43 PM

Quote:

<font face="Verdana, Arial" size="2">Originally posted by JackOlsen:
I'd go for a sport clutch </font>
Ha! Good Idea.
When I was but a wee tike, my dad bought a '70 Boss 302 Mustang. Althought I remember my mother driving it quite a bit, she HATED that competition clutch, especially on hills at an intersection.

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Clint
73T mfi coupe

RarlyL8 05-16-2001 01:50 PM

I'm surprized at everyone. You must not care about your cars. My wife has never even SAT in my car. I bought her a BMW and then a Volvo. These cars belong to her, she can do with them what she wants. The 911 is my project, my blood, sweat, and cash. If she were to drive it and something happened it would cause far more damage between us than a trip to the mall is worth.
Chauvanistic? I don't give a damn. When she builds the car of her dreams I won't mind at all if I don't get a set of keys.

lukeh 05-16-2001 01:54 PM

Hard to say. If she had another car to drive then I would say you are not being unreasonable. I never take my car to the store so it can sit in a lot. Just look at some of the past topics posted on the horror stories of mall parking. However, if she had no other vehicle to drive, then I think it's unreasonable to strand her at home with a car she can't use. Either get her another car or you need to take the Porsche to work and find a safe place to park it.

Luke
88 turbo cab

kumma 05-16-2001 01:55 PM

I'd have to say yes. Drive that sucker. Not to be unsympathetic but it's just a car. When i bought my 73' i let my mother sister drive it, and even offered to let my grandma drive it. Anyone who asks drive my Z-28 I just throw them the keys. I think you should be happy your wife wants to drive it. I have seen tons of women driving newer 911's around here.

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Craig 73T in many pieces

Planter91C2 05-16-2001 02:13 PM

lukeh, she had another car to drive so that wasn't an issue.

I admit I felt a little bad about it today because it caused an argument, but I thought you guys would understand.

RarlyL8, you couldn't have said it better !

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Daryl 91C2 Targa

[This message has been edited by Planter91C2 (edited 05-16-2001).]

magilla 05-16-2001 02:38 PM

Craig (kumma),
WHY is your '73 in pieces? Have anything to do with your Mother, Sister, or Grandmother?

http://www.pelicanparts.com/ultimate/tongue.gif

magilla

[This message has been edited by magilla (edited 05-16-2001).]

Jim Smolka 05-16-2001 03:21 PM

Simple solution, install a race seat that has non movable seat adj. Should work, unless she is about the same height.

MarkY 05-16-2001 03:53 PM

I was getting a kick out of just reading this thread, but with all the flack Planter91C2 is getting, I thought I'd chime in.

Nobody loves their wife more than I do, and my wife does NOT drive my 911. My wife would never even ask to drive it.

I bought my wife a 2000 Infiniti I30, which is a fairly nice daily driver. My daily driver is a truck. My wife knows that I have wanted a 911 since I was in high school. When I first got it, I asked her if she wanted to drive it (with me in it). She said she was just happy to ride in it with me and look at my big grin. She said she knows what this car means to me, and would feel terrible if something was to happen while she was driving it.

I've worked my ass off to be able to afford a 911 weekend toy. My wife respects that, and together we love taking it for a drive. Its just that I'm the one that does the driving.



------------------
1988 black on black Coupe
www.cheaterswayside.com/911/gallery.asp?sort=0&userid=339

Mike Feinstein 05-16-2001 04:09 PM

Daryl:

These guys are waaaaay nuts. . . and you were waaaaay right! My wife asked to back the P-car out of the garage and bounced over the curb and up onto the lawn. She got out of the car and explained that the last stick-shift she had, had the clutch in the middle!!! (She had been pressing the clutch frantically thinking it was the brake).

Anyway, I love my wife dearly, and what's important is that she knows and respects what that car means to me (after that incident, she is quite happy to be a passenger).

There is no way that your wife didn't know that you would be a nervous wreck until your baby returned, ding free. It is NOT just a car (like a Taurus) that can be patched up by an insurance company. . .it is your pride and joy. If you're like me, you park far away from other cars, fall asleep thinking about your next mod, spend hours painstakingly detailing and polishing, etc.

No one knows your car's ideosyncracies like you do. Be proud of yourself.

You did right man! You did us proud!

Mike
94 C2 cab

Fishcop 05-16-2001 04:22 PM

I've also been reading this with much amusement.

You are not being unreasonable full stop! The fact that she had another car to use is proof of that. Our house is my wife's "thing". I do not change stuff around in the house, move furniture or paint without her permission....I'm a good little boy around the house and do as I'm told http://www.pelicanparts.com/ultimate/biggrin.gif

My car is my "thing" and she knows it!

BTW it's not that I'd never let her drive it (it is JUST a car), it's that you put soooo much effort into the things, it's difficult not to be over-protective

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John Forcier
69 911T

john walker's workshop 05-16-2001 04:28 PM

if the wife respects the fact that the car doesn't need any parking lot damage and parks it out away from the crowd in a carefully chosen spot, then fine, have at it i say. it's the family toy and we like to keep em nice. if my wife just parked it any old place, i'd put my foot down too. we got a lot of time and $ in these things! try carving on HER good china with a steak knife.


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