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Racerbvd's Avatar
The Ant and the Grasshopper

The Ant and the Grasshopper

There is an 'Old Version' and a 'Modern Version' ...

Two Different Versions! Two Different Morals!

OLD VERSION:

The ant works hard in the withering heat all summer long, building his
house and laying up supplies for the winter.

The grasshopper thinks the ant is a fool and laughs and dances and plays
the summer away. Come winter, the ant is warm and well fed.

The grasshopper has no food or shelter, so he dies out in the cold.

MORAL OF THE STORY: Be responsible for yourself!

-------------------------------------------

MODERN VERSION:

The ant works hard in the withering heat all summer long, building his
house and laying up supplies for the winter.

The grasshopper thinks the ant is a fool and laughs and dances and plays
the summer away.

Come winter, the shivering grasshopper calls a press conference and
demands to know why the ant should be allowed to be warm and well fed
while others are cold and starving.

CBS, NBC, PBS, CNN, and ABC show up to provide pictures of the shivering
grasshopper next to a video of the ant in his comfortable home with a
table filled with food. America is stunned by the sharp contrast.

How can this be, that in a country of such wealth, this poor
grasshopper is allowed to suffer so?

Kermit the Frog appears on Oprah with the grasshopper, and everybody
cries when they sing, 'It's Not Easy Being Green. '

Al Sharpton stages a demonstration in front of the ant's house where the
news stations film the group singing, 'We shall overcome.' Jesse then
has the group kneel down to pray to God for the grasshopper's sake.

Nancy Pelosi & Barack Obama exclaim in an interview with Larry King that
the ant has gotten rich off the back of the grasshopper, and both call
for an immediate tax hike on the ant to make him pay his fair share.

Finally, the EEOC drafts the Economic Equity & Anti-Grasshopper Act
retroactive to the beginning of the summer.

The ant is fined for failing to hire a proportionate number of green
bugs and, having nothing left to pay his retroactive taxes, his home is
confiscated by the government.

Hillary gets her old law firm to represent the grasshopper in a
defamation suit against the ant, and the case is tried before a panel
of federal judges that Bill Clinton appointed from a list of single-parent welfare
recipients.

The ant loses the case.

The story ends as we see the grasshopper finishing up the last bits of
the ant's food while the government house he is in, which just happens
to be the ant's old house, crumbles around him because he doesn't maintain it.

The ant has disappeared in the snow.

The grasshopper is found dead in a drug related incident and the house,
now abandoned, is taken over by a gang of spiders who terrorize the
once peaceful neighborhood.

MORAL OF THE STORY: Be careful how you vote in 2008!!

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Byron

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Old 06-06-2008, 10:16 AM
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Old 06-06-2008, 10:17 AM
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Your picture did not work Shaun

Byron, I did a solitary toast myself for Phil last night at the designated time, white russian, not beer.

Silly story, except it is not that far from where we are heading, sad to say.
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Old 06-06-2008, 10:32 AM
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Too funny, that's exactly what I was thinking of Shaun.
Old 06-06-2008, 10:43 AM
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what is it? all I have is a red "X"
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Old 06-06-2008, 10:56 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Tobra View Post
Your picture did not work Shaun

Byron, I did a solitary toast myself for Phil last night at the designated time, white russian, not beer.

Silly story, except it is not that far from where we are heading, sad to say.
Thanks, at 9:30 I switched from Capt. & Coke to Scotch & water in his honor.
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Old 06-06-2008, 11:13 AM
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Good story but you left out critical information. The Ant's credit for working hard is unearned. Sure, he put up stores and was well-positioned for winter but the hard work was done by a large number of aphids working under harsh conditions for low pay and no benefits. Reliable sources also report that many of those aphids were illegal aliens. This report cannot be confirmed because the Ant locked those workers out as the weather cooled and they perished.

The tussle between the Ant and the Grasshopper is a classic one, often repeated. They both live in a world centered around opportunism and greed.....and the grasshopper simply bested the Ant in this instance. The grasshopper's political affiliation is of no consequence but it should be noted that his voting record (unpublished of course since he is a capitalist and not a public figure) follows the conservative pattern you would expect from someone with his economic interests at stake. Next year, the Ant hopes to leverage the policial and community forces as effectively as the grasshopper did this time around.
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Old 06-06-2008, 11:21 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Tobra View Post
what is it? all I have is a red "X"
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=57ta7mkgrOU
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Old 06-06-2008, 11:30 AM
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Awesome!

Forwarding that one to a few people.
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Old 06-06-2008, 12:29 PM
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ants are commies
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QUESTION!!!
Old 06-06-2008, 01:44 PM
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yeah, but there is no winter in Florida
Old 06-06-2008, 01:48 PM
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But they have FIRE ants in Florida

You guys are not even thinking about workman's comp claims for the aphids, which would be substantial if my garden is any example. There must be lot of attrition due to ladybugs, and getting devoured by a ladybug would be a pretty horrible way to go.


Kermit should have been holding his guitar the other way if he was doing his Kurt Cobain impression, which is what that little video reminded me of...

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Old 06-06-2008, 11:17 PM
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