Use to be an socially acceptable punishment when I was growing up but it isn't nowadays, and if you think it is then you wouldn't have a problem using it on a child in front of a social worker.
I have a cousin that is a social worker is Dodge Co. in WI and she told me once that if they have enough evidence that they can go back and charge someone with child abuse so there must not be a statute of limitations in WI.
IMHO you never lay a hand on someone elses children, you bring it to the parents attention and ask them to deal with it, if they dont, you ask them to leave...

I punched a 7 yr. old kid in the mouth once, hard. Nothing happened to me and he started behaving properly thereafter.

I've never struck my 11 year old son - no spanking, no nothing. There are far more effective ways to let them know that some things are not acceptable. My son has been a handful since birth, but if you meet him today you'll find a very polite, social, and funny kid. That is due to a lot of hard work and staying on top of him constantly with consistent limits and logical consequences.

imho a lot of people smack their kids around because it makes them feel good. Just because your parents did it doesn't mean it is right or a good idea. As for the OP, do not have the party at your house - neutral ground. And don't invite them over. One reason I'm glad I don't have a lot of extended family (almost zero) - I get to choose who I spend my time with.

Giving a child a spanking is child abuse?

Only in CA, WA or Ann Arbor.

WTF are you talking about? "Makes them feel good?????" I agree with most of your post, but this....:rolleyes:

I have never touched my 4 year old but have swatted my two year old on the behind. I only felt the need to swat my two year old to shock him when he was doing something very dangerous and the words weren't working. He never did it again.

My boys are extremely well behaved, polite and courteous.

The only place I have ever hit my children is on the hand...and haven't had to do so for many, many years.

The point of making them hold out their hand, which we never hit hard, was to make a point, to ensure they understood they have a responsibility to do the right thing as agreed to in prior conversation with them. They know the standard we as a family desire.

Honest mistakes are ok, being dishonest about anything is not.

I have great kids...I am extremely proud of both of them:cool:

Plain/simple: Good parents = good kids.

Although possible, rarely will you see azzwipe parents with well-behaved children.

Read the post...Spanking them with a belt or a yardstick, yeah. If you spank them with your hand and leave marks, that is also child abuse...Ask a social worker and see what they consider child abuse...

I guess you would be an expert on kids since you have none of your own or do you watch supernanny on a regular basis...

I am an expert on many things. I wouldn't comment otherwise.

I know this may be hard to believe for many, and I'm not bragging or saying this is even the right way to do things . . . but I've never hit or even threatened to hit any of my kids, or in fact never even raised my voice to them.

As far as results, they are the most well disciplined kids I know (really). By "well-disciplined," I mean by objective standards - straight A students, piano and other musical instrument players (requires a lot of discipline to learn), excel at sports (some through some talent, all through a lot of hard work), etc.

I believe, personally, that their success is because of the lack of fear, intimidation, etc. in our household. Hitting a child, or yelling at them, imo is counterproductive.

Well...I was 8 at the time. Point is, a punch in the mouth changed his behavior from that point forward.

Don't you all think it's time to for the Gov stop this "child abuse" crap; I'm not talking about cigarette burns and bones broken every week.
I mean were social workers are called because your kids messed up and you were seen spanking them by some cow with no kids who called and made it sound like attempted murder.
Many kids will listen to words, some need to feel the words before they hear them and even then some kids; Well....:rolleyes:

Also just for the record I have 2 kids, never had to spank them but their hands had a red tint a few times.
And when I was a kid- well let me just say "hot wheels tracks" :eek: yes I learned right/wrong fast.

That beats getting arrested.

Rent a pavilion in a park nearby and have the party there, maybe rent one of those bounce houses or something to keep them busy, plan games and such as well. Problem solved, of course this will not fix the actual problem but will keep the little monster from tearing up your place.

Danny,

Your parents sounded like my dad, FYI, I refise to lay a hand on my kids, my little one could probably use a good beating but using words has proved to be pretty effective with both of them.

I remember the beatings I caught when I was a kid and they would land my dad in jail today, I look back at those days not with a warm, "those were the days" feeling but more of a what an A-hole.

Stupid people use violence to get their point across, I like to think I am more intelligent than that and can use words to work out problems. So far its working out good for my wife and I.

imho some/many who smack their kids around do so because they are modeling their parents behavior and it satisfies psychological urges. In effect they feel better about themselves when they hit their kids. Many are then remorseful and feel bad, but they end up doing it again. Abuse is abuse...

I don't think that corporal punishment is necessarily child abuse. Depends on the circumstance and context. But I chose not to spank my child. I have grabbed him and "led him in the right direction" before however.

I only received "spankings", not "beatings". Although my old man threatened to use the belt, he never did (my mom preferred a wooden spoon, and she used it!). Spanking your kid isn't "violence", I don't care how you cut it.

If more kids were spanked, we wouldn't have the problems we have with the current crop. If spanking/corporal punishment breeds violence, why do we have so many teenage shooters/murderers today? 12 ~ 14 y/o kids using guns for robberies and murders? That stuff was pretty rare when I was a kid. As a matter of fact, I can't recall one incident involving a violent pre-teen when I was growing up, other than schoolyard fights.

No Danny the problem today is parents are not parents, especially the ones your talking about with "teenage shooters".

They are both working (not when we were kids right Danny) and do not care nor have time for their kids.

It has nothing to do with whether they "spank" their kids or not it has everything to do with how much quality time they spend with them.

Believe it or not, talking it out with your kids and not spanking takes much more time and effort than you can believe.