Idiot Sightings.

[Rusty Heap]

IDIOT SIGHTING:


My daughter and I went through the McDonald's take-out window and I gave the clerk a $5 bill. Our total was $4.25, so I also handed her a quarter..
She said, 'you gave me too much money.'
I said, 'Yes I know, but this way you can just give me a dollar back.'
She sighed and went to get the manager who asked me to repeat my request.
I did so, and he handed me back the quarter, and said 'We're sorry but they could not do that kind of thing.' The clerk then proceeded to give me back 75 cents in change. Do not confuse the clerks at MacD's.

IDIOT SIGHTING:

We had to have the garage door repaired. The Sears repairman told us that one of our problems was that we did not have a 'large' enough motor on the opener. I thought for a minute, and said that we had the largest one Sears made at that time, a 1/2 horsepower. He shook his head and said, 'Lady, you need a 1/4 horsepower.' I responded that 1/2 was larger than 1/4 and he said, 'NOOO, it's not. Four is larger than two.' We haven't used Sears repair since. Happened in Ottawa .

IDIOT SIGHTING:

I live in a semi rural area. We recently had a new neighbor call the local township administrative office to request the removal of the DEER CROSSING sign on our road. The reason: 'Too many deer are being hit by cars out here! I don't think this is a good place for them to be crossing anymore.' Story from Collingwood , Ontario .

IDIOT SIGHTING:

My daughter went to a local Taco Bell and ordered a taco. She asked the person behind the counter for 'minimal lettuce.' He said he was sorry, but they only had iceberg lettuce. From Winnipeg , Manitoba .

IDIOT SIGHTING:

I was at the airport, checking in at the gate when an airport employee asked, 'Has anyone put anything in your baggage without your knowledge?' To which I replied, 'If it was without my knowledge, how would I know?' He smiled knowingly and nodded, 'That's why we ask.'
Happened in Toronto , Ontario .

IDIOT SIGHTING:

The stoplight on the corner buzzes when it's safe to cross the street. I was crossing with a co-worker of mine. She asked if I knew what the buzzer was for. I explained that it signals blind people when the light is red. Appalled, she responded, 'What on earth are blind people doing driving?!' She is a government employee in Montreal , Quebec .

IDIOT SIGHTING:

When my husband and I arrived at an automobile dealership to pick up our car, we were told the keys had been locked in it... We went to the service department and found a mechanic working feverishly to unlock the driver's side door. As I watched from the passenger side, I instinctively tried the door handle and discovered that it was unlocked. 'Hey,' I announced to the technician, 'its open!' His reply, 'I know. I already got that side. This was at the Ford dealership in Guelph , Ontario .

STAY ALERT ! They walk among us...

[tabs]

Have U listened to the people on this Board?

[Christien]

Are these the reasons you moved to WA?

[MotoSook]

Obviously there is a lot of them in Canada

[gprsh924]

I have confused the hell out of the deli workers on my last three trips to Kroger here at school. The first time I had the audacity to ask for 2/3 a pound of ham. The lady looked at me like I was speaking french. She then asked if it was like 1/2. I said a little bit larger than that so she proceeded to put .27 lbs on the scale and ask me if that was enough. I told her to make it .66 and she finally understood.

On the next trip to the deli I wound up with the same nobel prize winner. I decided to make it easier and ask for 3/4 of a pound. She responded with "that's the same as three quarters, right?"

Last week I got a new deli worker. I asked for 3/4 a pound. She too needed to double check, responding with "that's .75, right?"

Simply astonishing that someone can work at the deli counter all day slicing meet based on weight and not have the basic fractions down. It is not as though I asked for 12ths or 16ths. Oh, and the first woman was at least 25-30. the woman in the last interaction was over 45.

[dipso]

My brother and I were at a local diner one morning. We were ordering breakfast at the counter, eggs and bacon.
The counter person asked "How do you like your eggs"? My brother answered "I don't know, I haven't tasted them yet".
I thought that was the funniest thing.

I think we would be the idiots in the story. But the above stories just reminded me of that morning.

[Vern Lyle]

A sign on the wall says “$5 dollar pitchers”. I asked the bartender - is a pitcher $5 or do you charge $5 for one dollar pitchers – that could be confusing. He turned and read it and said – huh?

[syncroid]

Thanks for the laugh. I liked the first idiot sighting the best. I cannot believe that people don't know how to count change back these days. It peeves me that they relie on their register display and just hand you back a wad of money/change.

[onewhippedpuppy]

Overheard in the Sears tool dept:

Customer: I need a socket for a square head bolt
Clerk: Does that have four sides?

[stomachmonkey]

Had an intermittent mail delivery problem. Long story.

During one of my rants to the local PO Supervisor she responds, "the only way I can think of to help you is for you to bring me a piece of mail that you did not get" ????????

[wcc]

Yes, and everyday the 'idiots' get dumber but minimum wage and their benefits go up. I had an 'idiot' working for me and a smart employee asked how do your afford your apartment working the same amount that she works and her reply was just get pregnant and the government will take care of you. Fortunately, the smart one didn't fall for this and the 'idiot' ended up unemployed because of many violations and sending me nude pics of herself. LOL! Not worth looking at, trust me! Maybe she thought that would save her job..... NOT!

[pwd72s]

Originally Posted by tabs

Have U listened to the people on this Board?

I've read your posts. Does that count?

[johnco]

Pretty sure it was an idiot that ordered the painted sign at a motel I saw long ago

Open 24 hrs a day / 7 days a week
Closed Sundays

[LWJ]

How about when I tried to get my pro-rated refund back on a defective battery at Kmart. It was a 48 month battery. They clerk had a table to pro-rate 60 month batteries only. She had no idea how to calculate the refund without a table.

It took me 15 minutes to educate her how to do this. I haven't been back!

[masraum]

THere was another thread here with a bunch of the same sort of stuff in it. One of the stories that stands out in my mind is that someone tried to pay for something at McDonalds with a $2 bill, not only would the cashier not take the bill, but the manager didn't think it was real. I think a cop even got called down, and may not have believed the bill was real.

[Nostril Cheese]

Not Always Right | Funny & Stupid Customer Quotes hours of entertainment

[aap1966]

First, a repost:
Work. No-one could access their e-mail. IT notified. Nothing heard back. Hours pass, still unable to acccess e-mail.
IT rung again.
Hostile Techie's response: "We fixed that hours ago, I e-mailed all staff how to get around it" ( I am NOT making that up)

More recently:
Walked into 7/11. Bought a newspaper ($1.00) and one chocolate. ($0.60)
"That'll be $15.10"
"I don't think so"
Points to till (firmly, fixing me with a steely gaze) "$15.10"
Discussion, brief maths lesson, epiphany, realisation that she had not "ended" previous transaction.

Most recently;
Bought $3.00 coffee. Paid $5.00 note. Received $1.10 change
(In Aust, 10 cent coins are similar in size to $1.00 coins)
Me; "This is a 10 cent coin"
She: "So??"
Me: "I think I'm meant to get $2.00 change"
She; Grabs 10 cent coin, rolls eyes, slams $1.00 coin on counter'
Me; "Thanks, and have a nice day"

[RWebb]

Originally Posted by pwd72s

i've read your posts. Does that count?

zing!

[Geronimo '74]

Originally Posted by Rusty Heap

IDIOT SIGHTING:

I was at the airport, checking in at the gate when an airport employee asked, 'Has anyone put anything in your baggage without your knowledge?' To which I replied, 'If it was without my knowledge, how would I know?' He smiled knowingly and nodded, 'That's why we ask.'
Happened in Toronto , Ontario .

Frikkin' hilarious!!

[red-beard]

Originally Posted by aap1966

First, a repost:
Work. No-one could access their e-mail. IT notified. Nothing heard back. Hours pass, still unable to acccess e-mail.
IT rung again.
Hostile Techie's response: "We fixed that hours ago, I e-mailed all staff how to get around it" ( I am NOT making that up)

The first macro virus was the "Concept" virus, around 1996. It was created to prove the point.

At the time, our antivirus software was updated weekly, automatically running a login/startup script/bat file (Windows 3.11 / Win 95). I manually updated my virus def files by going direct to the manufacturer. The script file accessed an out of date virus def file (Our IT people were all let go, and they went to contractors in 1995!). For my own machine, I disabled the script, and kept my files up to date, manually.

IT sent around an e-mail with a word document, warning of the Concept virus. The file was, of course, infected with the Concept virus. Most of GE Power Systems became infected that day...

Around the same time, there were a lot of stupid chain e-mail hoaxes. One of them is a classic, the one where people are being drugged and waking up in a bath-tub of ice and finding a kidney gone. Anyway...

One of the departments, a very high tech one mind you (Gas Turbine combustion systems, FYI), sent a paper news letter around. Yes hard copy newsletters. Imagine! They included news of all the new developments, what was going on in the lab as well as at the field test sites. I headed up warranty for our department and was head of all new instrumentation and control hardware, so I worked closely with them. (Aside, the CRAZY EYES girlfriend was a combustion engineer). Anyway...

The head of the department thought the kidney issue was so important, it was included in the hard-copy newsletter.

I called the secretary (still had a few then) and told her it was an e-mail hoax. She became quite defensive about it. She swore that this had actually happened to one of our field engineers. Her boss (the department head) had told her so...