Australia...What are the worst things about it?

[sammyg2]

You mean Oklahoma with a beach?
They export really dumb outback steakhouses.

(yeah I know, we're responsible for that. Shame on us)

That aren't very good at playing knifey spoony either.





Seriously, all that needed to be said was handled when we sent Quigley down there
He could kick Chuck Norris' butt, if Chuck was a really long ways away.




I'd really like to visit that place some day, but they gots all kinds of animals and bugs and stuff that will kill you and eat you.
I'm comfortable here, on top of the food chain.

[lisa_spyder]

Here Peppy,

Just show her this...(from a few months ago)

One thing about we Aussies - (as dewolf pointed out) we know how to laugh at ourselves .

[nzporsche944s2]

I was there a few days ago and I'm in Brisbane at least once a month. The worst thing about Australia is the number of New Zealanders that have moved there........ kidding

If it wasn't for my family here in NZ I would be living in Brisbane in a heartbeat. Better weather, better economy, higher pay for equivalent jobs, strong AU dollar, more choice (of everything).

[BeyGon]

Originally Posted by javadog

They have been known to put fried eggs on their hamburgers.

JR

and they put BEETS on them, what's up with that????

[lisa_spyder]

Dean,

That's what you get when you say "I'll have one with the lot thanks luv"...

Nothing like a great Aussie hamburger with the lot - YUM!

[sammyg2]

One other thing they got that I like, Olivia neutron bomb.
No I don't want to see a current picture of her. Let me enjoy a little fantasy for once.

[BeyGon]

Originally Posted by lisa_spyder

Dean,

That's what you get when you say "I'll have one with the lot thanks luv"...

Nothing like a great Aussie hamburger with the lot - YUM!

I like the Aussie grill, the big flat plate with onions and sausages, but no BEETS.

[lisa_spyder]

No I don't want to see a current picture of her. Let me enjoy a little fantasy for once.

Oh yes you do Sammy! Olivia Newton John is in her early 60s and is a breast cancer survivor. She is putting her enormous energy into raising funds for a state of the art multi-million dollar cancer and wellness centre attached to one of our hospitals in Melbourne.

Olivia performed at a football match at the MCG (our best and finest ground) a few weeks ago with Australian Football Legend Jim Stynes. Stynes had been released from hospital only a couple of days before after having 2 rounds of brain surgery in less than a week. Stynes is still battling his cancer and teamed up with Olivia to raise a heap of dough for the Olivia Newton John Cancer and Wellness Centre by joining her on stage . He can't sing; still has a HUGE crush on Olivia and was wearing the silly Melbourne Demons hat (he is president of the Melbourne Football Club) to cover his surgery scarred head...

Check out our Liv... she's still quite the neutron bomb - good on her

[lowyder993s]

They have bad-azz criminals!!!

YouTube - ‪Chopper Reid Driving School‬‏

NSFW!!!!

Went there 3 yrs ago and had Mark Richards make me a custom board...highlight of the trip!

[Mothy]

We still ask if you have a criminal record at the point of entry on the immigration form.

Used to be a condition of entry.

We are also one of the few countries who eat the animals on our coat of arms.

[BeyGon]

Originally Posted by Mothy

We still ask if you have a criminal record at the point of entry on the immigration form.

Used to be a condition of entry.

We are also one of the few countries who eat the animals on our coat of arms.

Here are the prisoner quarters at my friends family home.

[TimT]

Wow she is still uber hot!!!...

My wife is of Chinese heritage, went to school in Sydney and hold an Aussie passport.... I crack up a lot when we talk since she peppers her English with Aussie slang....

We have an interview coming up at the US consulate in Sydney for my immigration petition for her and my son (step).....Can't wait for that, or to visit your country.... planning on spending 2 months...

I really miss my wife

[RWebb]

your comment - I hope - was meant for Ms. Newton John (even tho it followed a pic of a dog's rear)

[TimT]

Originally Posted by RWebb

your comment - I hope - was meant for Ms. Newton John (even tho it followed a pic of a dog's rear)

You are really an idiot... (oohhh...... no personal attacks waa waa waa)

A few of the previous posts in the thread were in regard to Olivia Newton John...

Then there is a post of a picture of an old brig and a dog skulking towards the brig..

Not sure how you tied the picture of a dog.. with Ms. Newton John..

Just had to say something?

Between you and a few others on this board, this BBS has a high percentage categorized as "Bloviatus Maximus" posting....


Sorry for the Hijack...

[944Larry]

On the serious side didn't I read somewhere that they took up all the guns down there?

[emcon5]

Originally Posted by lowyder993s

They have bad-azz criminals!!!

YouTube - ‪Chopper Reid Driving School‬‏

NSFW!!!!

Went there 3 yrs ago and had Mark Richards make me a custom board...highlight of the trip!

I like this one better:

NSFW bad words....

YouTube - ‪Chopper Reid - Harden the **** up, Australia‬‏

[lowyder993s]

I'll raise you one...

YouTube - ‪Chopper Airlines‬‏

[peppy]

Well we had our last appointment with my sons audiologist yesterday, and I was unsuccessful in changing her mind.

I guess Australia is getting one heck of a pediatric audiologist.

[cairns]

Great thread.

True about the Gatso's. Every time I visit I get a ticket. Australians drive UNBELIEVABLY slow. And if you go fast you get very dirty looks.

True about the nasties. But don't forget all the bats and even the birds (cassowaries) will attack you. And you can't swim in the ocean because the jellyfish will kill you too.

Sydney real estate is incredibly over priced. I kick myself for not buying a flat in Circular Quay when they were first being built- $400K AU at the time- probably $2M plus now. I wonder if their bubble is going to burst like the US did.

First time I saw Chopper Reid I fell over laughing. He came on a talk show, obviously drunk out of his gourd and the host said "You're pissed." Chopper said you're fu king right I'm pissed- you kept me back there for three fu cking hours what was I supposed to do then proceeded to describe murdering people in a completely hilarious fashion- I think I have three or four of his books. Amazing character.

Some Australian's ideas of service are a bit different.... there's an old joke about a visitor to QL who ordered a steak and salad. When the meal arrived the steak was cold and the salad was warm. When he complained the waitress turned around to everyone and said "Look at this- the b*stard thinks its Christmas."

Then there's this:
An Englishman wants to marry an Irish girl and is told he needs to become Irish before he can do so. He asks how and is told to visit his doctor. The doctor says it's a very simple operation I just remove remove 5% of your brain. The Englishman says what the heck and has the operation.

After the operation the Englishman wakes up and sees the doctor and a team of nurses standing over him- crying.

Before he can say anything the Doctor says "I am so terribly sorry, theres been a terrible mistake. We accidently removed 50% of your brain instead of 5%! The scalpel slipped and there's nothing I could do."

The patient sits up and says: "No worries, mate!"

At least they can be glad they're not Kiwis. Everyone from New Zealand who lives there says: "Have you been to my country? It's really beautiful- much better than here." Then why are you here????

(I needed a job- I hated the weather I'm going ot go back etc.) I never met an Aussie living in NZ.

And they don't have the All Blacks:

A man’s body was found in the harbour wearing an All Blacks jumper, pink panties, fishnet stockings and a dildo up his arse. Police removed the jumper to avoid any embarrassment to his family.

[Baz]

So what's wrong with a bit of beetroot now and then?

Australia - what's NOT to love? An AMAZING LAND and they LOVE Yanks (well as long as you're not an arsehole - heh)

I would LOVE to live down under - are you kidding me???? Woot!



RIP Mr. Slim Dusty:


My favourite rendition (Tina Arena at the '95 Australian Open men's final):




Filthy surf...yeah:


Xavier...yeah:


My 2 Blue Heelers....crickey!: